


The Rocktagon

by levilikeserenbooty (RawrForRiku)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Bromance, Comedy, Cookies, Eren in a mini skirt eventually, Eventual Smut, First Time, Freedom, Hanji's oreo obsession, Kidnapping, Kinda Slow Build, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin) and Cleaning, Light Angst, Light depression, M/M, Maybe jean in high heels, No Name, No-name au, POV Eren Yeager, POV Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Past Abuse, Past Torture, Protective Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Punk, Punk Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Rock Stars, Singing, Some Humor, Sorry Not Sorry, Tattoos, Wings of Freedom, Yaoi, everyone dies, god these tags, jk, lying in filth, okay i am sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-03-29 08:50:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 37,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3890080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RawrForRiku/pseuds/levilikeserenbooty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren Jaeger had the typical lifestyle of any other teenage boy, albeit he had trouble making friends. Things were going smoothly up until his parents were murdered and he disappeared for half a year. It's been three months since he was found, and he's just trying to return things back to normal- as normal as possible, anyways- for his new life. However, after attending a life changing concert, he forms an anonymous band called No Name to get closer to the man who ignited a flame of hope inside of him. And that man just so happens to be the lead singer of the rock band Lying in Filth.</p><p>(**Previous title was Freedom**)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. In the Shitty Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't an angst party, sorry to crush your hopes <3 There is angst, but it's pretty light for a while. (Besides the first few chapters)
> 
> I'll probably end up revising the first two, maybe three, chapters to actually fit in with the story line a tad more lmao. For now, go forth and share your thoughts on my trash. ^^

_Eren_

       

Merely one hour remained until my departure into the terrifying void known as the outside. My fingers shook lightly while they fastened the button on my jeans. Mikasa had scolded me, ranting it was too hot for jeans, but I begged to differ. Jeans blocked out the sun's penetrating UV rays. No sun, no sunburn, no problem. Hers and Armin's opinions contrasted greatly with mine; while I wore jeans and a T-shirt, they always wore tank tops and shorts.

I don't think I even owned a pair of shorts.

"Will you hurry up? You're taking longer than I did and I'm a girl," Mikasa huffed from my bedroom doorway. She leaned up against the frame, shifting foot to foot with excitement.

"What does gender have to do with anything?" I retorted with an eye roll and my own huff of breath."Keep your diapers on. I just need to get this belt on and we can leave." For some reason, the excess length of the belt wouldn't tuck into the last loop. I fumbled with it a few more times before giving up and yanking my shirt down over it.

"Well, now it looks like a dick," Mikasa snorted in amusement. She shook her head at my futile attempts then took matters into her own hands. Her fingers lifted my shirt out of the way and set to work on looping the leather though the fabric while I growled in frustration for having to get help from my sister once again. "There. Done. Now let's go," she commanded, lightly smacking my stomach.

I hastily snatched my phone off the dresser, across from my bed and closet, and rushed out of the room to keep up with the crazed girl. She took the stairs three at a time so I took my time on each step just to irritate her. By the time I reached the bottom step, she was out the front door, into the scorching heat, ticket grasped in a tight fist like it was the most important thing in her life.

"Lock the door on your way out," our adoptive father's voice rumbled from the living room, then tacked on threateningly, "And don't. Be. Late." I gulped, ducking my head down, and gave the man a quick nod of acknowledgement as I shuffled through the open space between where said man sat and the kitchen. After testing the door knob a few times, I declared it safely secured.

Armin was chattering with Mikasa when I finally reached the pair socializing by the driveway. The blonde boy ran up and tackled me in the blink of an eye. My body unwillingly tensing up under Armin's bear hug, but he mentioned nothing about it.

"Oh my god, I've missed you guys," he confessed with a pout and grabbed Mikasa to pull her in for a group hug. I let out a short breathy laugh right beside his ear.

"It's only been a week, Ar," I reminded him. He pulled away from us with an offended expression, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Wow. You didn't miss me even though I brought back souvenirs from the beach? Well gee, okay then," he jokingly grumbled and whipped out two boxes: one for me and one for Mikasa. I first watched my sister open up her gift.

Her face lit up like a christmas tree and she carefully lifted up a necklace nestled inside the small pillow of cotton. A red and black pendant with the Aquarius symbol carved on the front, dangled from a silver chain. She was obsessed with zodiac stuff, and if the way she hugged the shit out of him didn't prove my point, I don't know what would.

Now I was just afraid of what he'd brought me. Before he'd gone, he'd told me he'd bring me back a baby squid. I didn't even know where I'd put one if I had it. I hesitantly opened the box, trying to peek in through a small crack just to make sure there wasn't a squid about to pop out and strangle me.

It wasn't a squid. Nor an animal.

Inside sat a mount of sand and on top, a familiar golden key rested on its side, connected to a brown leather cord. I instantaneously jumped on the blonde, unable to help myself, chanting 'thank you's at him. He smiled against my neck and hummed back in response.

I knew the key wasn't the real thing, but it was close enough to match the description in the stories my mother would tell us when we were kids. It was close enough to make me grin like the happiest little shit on the planet.

"Are you two done with your bromance yet?" Mikasa butted in with a sly smile. The two of us gave her an oh-fuck-off look but laughed, nonetheless.

"Let's go or we'll be late," Armin said swinging his arms around our necks. I managed to hold back the involuntary flinch that time and sighed staring down at the concrete sidewalk.

Maybe I _could_  get through this.

 

_____________

 

 

      The band on stage was finishing up their last song and the next one coming up, Lion In Fear or something like that, was who my best friends had been waiting three years to see live. From the excitement on their faces, I could tell there was no turning back now. I was officially trapped and there would be no escape.

     We weaved our way through all of the tightly packed bodies, holding hands so none of us got separated. The stench of beer and cigarette smoke wafted around and somewhere in the mix, there was the hint of marijuana. I turned my nose up at the funky skunk scent. My attention was derived from the mix of aromas when we reached the center of the ocean of people and a mosh pit had formed. I scrunched up my eyebrows in distaste and turned to look at Mikasa.

      She beamed at me with a shit eating grin, her dark hair flopping around in its pony tail, and yelled over the powerful beat of drums, "As soon as Lying In Filth comes on, I'm jumping in there." (At least I was sort of close to the actual band name.) A constricted feeling grasped my chest and the pain must've shown on my face when Mikasa's ecstatic expression faded to concern in the fraction of a second. "Is that alright? I already know Armin won't get in. He's too scared he'll get trampled." Her grin returned but had a playful edge to it when Armin smacked her arm lightly and argued back.

     "For your information, I'm planning on crowd surfing. I _would_ get in the mosh pit, but I'd rather not consume dirt," he shouted to us and wrinkled his button nose up at the thought. I chuckled trying to hide the nervous feeling in my gut. I didn't want to be left alone with a bunch of strangers. It would leave me feeling vulnerable.

      "Oh shush. Hey," she turned to me, "you should crowd surf with Armin! Its amazing; it feels like you're floating, I promise. And they won't drop she tried to tempt me. I chewed on the lip ring adorning my face and shoved my hands deep in the pockets of my jeans with a shrug. The sun soaked through the black fibers of the shirt I wore, making me shift my weight to block out the sun as much as possible with the help of another guy's towering shadow. I gave a small huff of irritation as the guy shifted on his feet as well, letting the sun return to simmer my skin. It increased my discomfort tenfold.

      "I might," was the simple response I came up with. Armin took my answer as  a "yeah sure why not", but, in reality, I would most likely have a panic attack if someone ever tried to lift me off the ground.

      "Okay. Let me know if you wanna and we'll find someone to get you up," he poked my cheek and tucked in his tank top. The last band's set equipment was cleared off while new props and equipment for Lying In Filth was rolled out. A giant banner rolled out across the back of the stage with the band's name written on it, to which all the fans screamed and 'woo'ed. My friends bounced on the balls of their feet while applying more sunscreen, and I impatiently stared up at the cloudless sky.

_Please, please, please. Just let there be a few clouds soon._

      As soon as Armin grabbed my arm, the band bounced out on stage. A guy with short, pale brown hair came out first, spinning a pair of drumsticks and beginning a fast-paced beat as soon as he was seated. Next, two girls sauntered out on either side of the stage; one had a bass guitar strapped over her shoulder and blonde locks that fell just above the guitar strap. The other girl carried an electric guitar and had red pigtails framing her face. As soon as the girls took their places, they joined in with the drummer, creating a euphonious (and almost entrancing) sound. The fans screamed louder and louder as the group filed out on stage.

      Mikasa and Armin were already head banging to the beat while I stood awkwardly on my tip toes trying to spot the vocalist. For a good minute, I thought maybe that was it and there wasn't one. Or maybe they were having technical difficulties. However, a second later, the fog machines were cranked up all the way and a pale man with black hair parted down the middle slowly walked out to the middle of the stage with a smirk dancing across his features.

      I had to cover my ears for a moment due to the shrieks and shrills of all the girls around me, but let out a laugh when I saw Armin and Mikasa do the same. Honestly, I was screaming on the inside too. My sexuality was no secret, I'd dated many guys in the past. Majority of the people that knew me, knew I wasn't straight in any way, shape, or form. So it was clear to see that this guy was easily the most attractive man I'd ever laid eyes on- as cliché as that may sound.

      Despite being soo close to the stage, all I could make out was his sharp jaw line, a pair of thin narrow eyes accompanied by low set eyebows, spider bites, a small spiked choker, and the muscles in his arms, chest, and abdomen. A black Misfits shirt with the sleeves cut off hugged his body perfectly while a pair of black skinny jeans with holes cut in the knees rested on his hips a little too low for the sake of my sanity. The bullet belt and a silver studded belt did nothing to calm my burning hormones.  _Jesus, Jaeger, get a grip._ _  
_

       Mikasa brought me back to reality by wiping a hand across my chin and yelling with a chuckle, "Stop drooling, lover boy." I rolled my eyes with a wave of my hand to shoo her away to the mosh pit. She complied and disappeared within a second.

      I turned my attention back to the stage after making sure Armin was still by my side. The beat of the drums slowed down to a steady rhythm before the singer raised his fist straight out in front of him, everyone following suit, and his deep voice formed lyrics.

_Our names won't be remembered_

_If we die like trampled flowers_

_I refuse to be forgotten_

_Written off as less than worthless_

     The beat picked back up a tiny bit and I found the corners of my lips lifting as I watched everyone around me sing along and dance.

_Scream and cry_

_But none will hear you_

_Plead and beg_

_But none will help you_

     My chest constricted in the slightest bit and I subconsciously winced, looking down. I glanced to my right when Armin took my hand in his for encouragement and gave him a small smile in return.

_There are beings that live off of fears_

_And their words are like knives_

_As they play with our lives_

_They'll try to control you_

_As if they own you_

_Will you let them still your freedom?_

      I took a deep breath to calm myself and let go of my friend's hand. It was time I learned to stand on my own. My shoulders swayed with the tempo and slowly, my muscles began o relax. Armin smiled brightly up at me, relieved I was finally getting comfortable, and pointed to himself then up towards the sky. I nodded and flipped him a peace sign as he was raised into the air and thrown into the crowd.

I gave a short laugh at his terrified expression as his shirt was accidentally pushed up to the middle of his chest. By the time he tugged it back down, he was whisked away to the front of the crowd.

    Throughout the next four songs, I lightly bobbed my head to the beat, waiting for Mikasa or Armin to return. Occasionally I'd stare at the vocalist, and at times I thought, with some wild ray of hope, maybe he was returning the stare. But there were thousands of people around me. It was impossible to tell.

    During their third song, the drummer was rapping the sticks at a lightning speed, leading up to a dramatic pause right before the chorus picked up again. When that pause came, he threw his drumsticks out to the crowd and snatched two more from his pockets.

     One of the sticks actually came my way, but the fans went bat shit crazy trying to grab it, and somehow, I managed to get knocked in the ear by an elbow. I scowled up at the giant sweat-drenched douche bag even though he wasn't paying attention to me. 

     I turned my attention back to the stage with a quiet growl of annoyance and took note of that amused wide smirk on the vocalist's face, threatening to turn into a thin laugh. I childishly scratched my head with my middle finger and smiled when he shook his head at my behavior. Instead of allowing myself to be irked any further, I shut my eyes and listened to him sing. His voice was hypnotizingly beautiful, deep, melodic. It was like heroine and I was undoubtedly hooked on that shit like I couldn't get enough. It almost felt as if we were alone and he was only singing to me.

      For the first time in a while, I felt elated to be outside.

      As the fourth song ended, the raven-haired man announced, "This next song isn't one we wrote, but a cover we'd love to play for you all. And just a heads up- it's a bit slower than our usual stuff." He nodded to his band members and immediately, I felt my heart sink when they began to play.

I'd only listened to the song a couple of times, but both times it left me in a certain kind of mood. My eyes drifted back to the ground, smile erased.

_I can see every tear you've cried_

_Like an ocean in your eyes._

_All the pain and the scars have left you cold._

     I glimpsed up and there was no mistake; the singer was _still_  looking down at me. I crossed my arms over my chest as if to protect myself and hummed along.

_I can see all the fears you face_

_Through a storm that never goes away._

_Don't believe all the lies that you've been told._

     The crowd started to sway and some lifted a hand or two in the air.

_I'll be right here, now_

_To hold you when the sky falls down._

_I will always_

_Be the one to take your place._

     I closed my eyes and hummed louder, to the point where I was almost singing while feeling the man's gaze on me still. Why wasn't he looking at anyone else? It was uncomfortable having an intimidating gaze bore into you like they could see every little bad thing you've done.

_When the rain falls_

_I won't let go._

_I'll be right here_.

      At some point in the song, Armin returned to my side and leaned his hip against mine to give me comfort. Seeing the expression on my face, he did the most comical dance that never failed to cheer me up.

Although it helped, it didn't stop the shitty flashbacks of forceful hands wrapping around my arms, dragging me backwards into a van. Or the flashbacks of the sun blistering my chest, ropes bounding me to the earth. My eyebrows furrowed and I dragged in a shaky breath. _'I'm not there anymore. It's okay. I'm fine.'_

     The song ended and everyone hooted and hollered. Afraid to look around, I kept my eyes closed as the next song started up, this one being just as fast paced as the first four they'd played.

     Somewhere nearby I heard a booming voice with a country accent say, "This one wants to?" and another familiar voice gave an affirmative response. I cracked open an eye to see Jean, an annoying old classmate who I always called pony boy, standing about a foot away with an evil look in his eyenand a devilish smirk to match. My eyes narrowed on him in confusion then widened to the size of Dolly Parton's tits as two large calloused hands wrapped around my arms. By the time I was being lifted, I was already kicking and screaming bloody murder.

    ' _No no nono. It can't happen again. It. Can't.'_  

     Everything around me became a blur. It all swirled in a mixture of colors.

     There was no crowd.

     There was no band.

     There was nothing.

     I was back in that deserted field, stripped down to nothing but my boxers, tied to the ground. I called for help but my lips didn't make a sound. Breath wouldn't fill my lungs anymore. My throat felt like it was closing.

But for some reason, when I looked up at the sky, there was a ghost image of a pair of thin gray eyes staring back at me, calming my nerves, and a voice in the back of my head saying, "Don't let them steal your freedom."

And the world was consumed by the dark.


	2. Lying In Filth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quick Levi perspective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here I should be stuying for a math final that'll determine whether or not I graduate, and instead I'm writing ereri fanfiction. I'm horrible hahaha. 
> 
> This is just kind of a short filler to get an insight of Levi's mind. It's so difficult for me to write his POV haha. I enjoy the challenge, though. Also, just a heads up, sometimes characters will be OOC. I can't make them perfectly like the characters in SnK. Sorry in advance if that bugs you.
> 
> Next update will hopefully be as soon as possible and will return to Eren's POV. I'm gonna enjoy his reactions to Levi in the next chapter haha.

_Levi_

   

     When I came out on stage, the kid's eyes were the first thing I noticed when I saw him standing awkwardly in the crowd. Even though we were far apart, his turquoise eyes squinted from the sun light, his brown hair flopping around over them like a mop when he bounced his head along with the drums. In a way, he stood out among the rest of our fans. There was something different in his eyes from the rest. A light missing, maybe. Perhaps it was the empty vibe I felt that sent me back into my past when I looked in them.

     I narrowed my eyes, focusing my full attention back on the microphone. ' _Turquoise is a shitty color.'_

     When we played a cover of an old song I used to listen to twenty-four seven, my attention returned to the brown headed dork and watched the boy's face fall into a frown, his eyes developing a far away look in them. I retuned my thoughts to the lyrics I was singing. However, not a minute later, my mind went back to the hundreds of people in front of me. I scanned the audience while we began the next song on our playlist. Majority of the people wore black tank tops, while some wore black T's. The sun was unrelenting, but none of them seemed to care.

     The tempo picked up and reverberated through my bones. I relished in the feeling, losing myself in the melody, slipping away to another place. It felt like the perfect home.

     As soon as I was in my own world, I was dragged out by a scream and my eyes snapped open. Even though I was right beside the speakers, I could hear him shout over the music, "Stop! Oh my g- stop! No! Nononono! Please don't do this!"

     My eyebrows furrowed when I saw the terror stricken across his features. _'Is this kid bullshitting or what?_ ' Despite Isabel, Petra, and I deciding to continue on with the song, Farlan, our drummer, stopped. The rest of us simultaneously stopped and I shot him a quick glare over my shoulder. ' _Why stop the entire show for some stupid brat afraid of heights?'_

     Farlan's voice carried through his microphone, echoing across the field, "Hey, put him down. The kid clearly doesn't want to surf." He was dropped immediately and the brunette collapsed to the ground. The guy's captor shrugged with his palms facing upward just as a girl with black hair suddenly popped out of a group of people and swung a fist at the burly man. A couple bystanders held her back before she could land a hit.

     This time my voice rang through the speakers.

     "Okay, okay. That's enough. Either calm the fuck down or leave." I motioned for security to pick up the kid right before Farlan cut me off.

     "Just bring the kid backstage, guys." I turned to give Farlan another dirty look, but he simply returned my stare with an amused one. _'What the fuck is he up to?'_

     A security man picked the kid up bridal style and waltzed away to our RV, the girl with black hair and a nerdy-looking blonde boy following suit. I held back a huff and instead, returned my attention to the fans.

     "Now where were we, eh? How about for the grand finale we play a song you all know? I want you guys to sing along with me, and even if you don't know the lyrics, mouth some random bullshit and join us in our Black Masquerade." The crowd bounced and yelled with wide smiles on their faces.

_'Time to re-enter my isolated world- without interruptions.'_

     Lyrics spilled freely from my lips while my eyelids closed, green-blue eyes entering my mind. A deep breath filled my lungs, and I momentarily held it in.

     ' _Turquoise is a beautiful color.'_

     Then, the breath was gone.


	3. Levi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren meets Levi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally sat down at 9 and it took me 3 hours to write 2 pages because I have a short attention span. Forgive me for being an hour late? Aha. I had to rewrite this chapter like 3 times because I'm a dumbass that kept forgetting to save. *sigh* Well now its finally here haha yay. Read on, SnK fandom. ❤

_Eren_

 

 

       Somewhere in the distance, I heard muffled voices. First, a high pitched voice belonging to a girl- Mikasa maybe? Then a deep voice carried through the room. And a third one that sounded like Armin reached my ears.

     "I'm sorry, but you can't get on the bus without permission. Either leave or I'll have to kick you out. That's my final warning," the deep voice became more understandable as my senses woke up. The bus?

      "Like hell I'll leave. Look here, you fucking oompa loompa, that's my little brother in there. I'm not going anywhere. I'll kick your ass if I have to. And that is my final warning," I heard Mikasa retort.

       I groaned and cracked open an eye, only to be blinded by a bright light. My head flinched away on instinct and I sat straight up, my eyes flying open in panic. After a few deep breaths, I came to terms with the fact I wasn't in a field now. I was in a bed with white sheets and a dark green comforter thrown over me haphazardly. My eyebrows pressed together. _'Where the fuck...?'_

      I looked around the room, trying to remember where I was. Nothing looked familiar. The walls matched the comforter, the carpeted floor matched the sheets, there was a white lamp and a small notepad resting on the surface of a bedside table. In the corner of the room closest to me were three guitars, all hanging up by their necks. Across the room, there were three doors, this middle one standing wide open, and two Misfits posters were hung on the first and third door. As soon as I caught sight of the Misfits poster, I recalled what'd happened before I'd blacked out and sighed. ' _I knew it was a bad idea_.'

      My attention went back to the middle door covered in writing. Caution tape was wrapped around the top and bottom and written between the tape in black bold letters was: **_Levi's Room. Stay Out._** I shook my head, still not clear as to where I was or who Levi was or why I was in his room.

      Suddenly the voices returned and I started to swing my legs off the bed when there was a loud thump, almost causing me to fall off the bed. My eyes widened and I turned towards the door to see Mikasa and Armin appear in the doorway a couple seconds later. They both gave a relieved sigh when they saw me, but Armin kept glancing behind them as if someone was about to jump out at them.  

    "Come on. We gotta go," Mikasa waved me over. Not questioning what happened, I pushed off the bed and rushed to the door. On our way out, I glanced around the room, realizing just how fancy the bus really was. We entered a short hallway full of bunk beds, then passed a small kitchen with marble counters and wooden cabinets, and closer to the front were two black leather sofas sitting on either side of the bus. A large flat screen TV hung above the sofa on the right. The driver's seat and the passenger's seat were covered with cheetah print seat covers. I snorted at the abrupt pattern. ' _Real classy_.'

      We descended the couple of steps to the paved ground and right as both of my feet hit the ground, I took in the giant man sprawled out on the ground. He wore a neon yellow shirt that had 'security' printed in bold black letters on it. My head immediately swung to the side to give Mikasa a deadpan stare. She shrugged, slinging an arm around my neck and smiled sheepishly at me. Armin shook his head but copied Mikasa and the two of us chuckled at her. ' _She would be the one to kick a security guard's ass just to make sure I'm alright.'_

      When we were twenty or so feet away from the bus, I looked down at the ground and stopped in my tracks. My pockets were empty. Armin and Mikasa's arms fell away from my shoulders as I muttered "shit" with an exasperated sigh. Armin's eyebrows kneaded together in worry.

      "What's wrong, Eren?" I pressed my lips into a thin line and licked the lip ring trying to decide just how badly I needed my phone. I told them what I'd forgotten and they gave me an exasperated sigh too. "Hurry while he's still knocked out."

       We stood there for a minute staring at each other not sure if it was a good idea to go back in. Before we could make a decision, however, I was abruptly bumped aside by a short moving wall. I stumbled into Armin and growled at the dickwad walking towards the bus.

     "Watch where you're standing, kid. You were in my way," he said loud enough for me to hear over his shoulder. My eyes narrowed to slits and I muttered 'asshole' beneath my breath as I straightened myself up.

      My eyes widened to the size of cue balls when I looked over the design on the side of the bus. The whole vehicle was black and two wings, one blue and one white, stretched across the exterior. Written across the wings in black splattered letters was: **Lying In Filth**. I stared bewilderedly at the man, noticing his undercut and his attire. It finally clicked. He must be--

      "Levi! Don't be rude to the fans," a sweet voice chided the munchkin. I twisted around to see the rest of the band coming our way. The blonde was far ahead of the other two and was the one who'd spoken. When she was a couple feet away, she paused to catch her breath and apologized. "I'm sorry. The heat makes him grumpy. I promise he's not always that rude," she took in a gulp of air before continuing, " _God_  he walks like he's in NASCAR. Okay, anyways, now I'm the one being rude." The red headed girl and the guy finally made it to our little gathering as she finished talking.

      "Heya. I'm Isabel. Just call me Izzy," the girl, Izzy, introduced herself, holding out a hand with a wide smile to accompany the greeting. My friends shook her hand while I crossed my arms over my chest. She shrugged and rested her hands in her jean pockets. "This cutie is Petra," she lifted a hand out of the pocket to point to the grinning blonde. Petra held up a peace sign with her fingers and waved them. "And this fug-nugget is Farlan," she jerked a thumb back at the guy who simply tipped his head. She chuckled when she noticed Armin and Mikasa more or less drooling over the three of them. "And finally, the short stack that just plowed your ass over is Levi. He doesn't normally take a liking to _people._ So try not to get butthurt; it's nothing personal." I nodded my head in understanding. I didn't get along with many people either- just Mikasa and Armin.

      "Were you all leaving already?" Petra spoke up with a disappointed frown.

      "Yeah. We didn't exactly have the nicest visit," Mikasa grumbled glancing at the bus. One of Izzy's eyebrows lifted in a perfect arch as she looked over. The two girls let out a laugh when they saw the security guard still lying unconscious on the ground. Even Farlan grinned shaking his head.

      "Poor Sawney," Petra said through a giggle. Izzy fist bumped Mikasa while calming her laughter.

      "Hey, he's a tough ass. He probably deserved it," Izzy was smiling from ear to ear. "You guys have to hang out with us. We have a PS3 and plenty of games," she offered in a sing songy voice. She grabbed Armin's and Mikasa's hands, gently tugging them in the direction of the van. They both looked back at me for approval.

      "Sure, why not," I affirmed with a nod of my head and a small smile. The three of them practically skipped the rest of the way to the bus while Farlan, Petra, and I took our time getting there. Farlan paused beside Sawney to tap his leather boot against his shoulder. The man didn't move an inch. He whistled in amazement, his eyebrows raised.

     "Your friend really did a number on him," he examined, sparing me a quick glance.

      "Sorry about that. She's super protective."

      "It's cool. None of us like him. He's just a douche hired by our manager," he went silent for a moment, seeming unsure of whether or not to continue. He did anyways. "Is she a friend or?"

      "Sister."

      "Ah," he nodded his head and climbed on the bus, Petra following after him. I took one last glimpse at the guard before hopping on board. ' _I wonder what that question was for_.' I tried to keep my eyes from narrowing on Farlan as I sat down on one of the sofas beside Mikasa and Petra. On the other sofa sat Farlan, Armin, and Izzy. She had a controller in hand and when I checked the TV above me, her player was in the middle of outrunning four cop cars. Armin was creating plans in his head for her to destroy as many cop cars as possible. Farlan was intently watching and 'woot'ed when she drove straight off a bridge onto the interstate.

      To my left, Mikasa and Petra made small talk about their band. No one had yet asked me why I'd flipped shit and fainted earlier and I was extremely grateful for that. I really didn't want to revisit the whole "Why won't you tell me? You must dislike me" festival. It's not that I didn't tell anyone because I didn't like them. It was because I wanted to forget what happened. And talking about it over and over again would just make more unwanted memories resurface.

       Suddenly the room seemed to shrink and I felt like I was spinning. I rested my head back against the sofa and closed my eyes, trying to look casual. The last thing I needed was Armin and Mikasa giving me a worried stare every two minutes. A sigh escaped my lips and Petra's voice made me open an eye.

     "Eren, would you like--"

      "Farlan I thought I told you to stop fucking around. Wait, no, I said to stop fucking _in my bed_ with people," Levi's voice cut in loudly, coming from the bedroom. Six pairs of perplexed eyes shifted in the direction of the newcomer. His voice became more distinguishable as he got closer. "Seriously, if you keep on you're going to get AI--," he stopped in the middle of his lecture when his eyes landed on the social group in his "living room". I looked down at my fingernails, the black paint chipped from lack of attention. I needed to get them redone soon.

     Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Farlan hold his hands up in defense and point a finger in my direction. He failed at holding back a small smirk of amusement. I narrowed my eyes before turning to finally look at the attractive man. Attractive was an understatement. His face was completely impassive, giving away no emotion. I felt trapped inside his gaze, grayish blue alluring orbs locking me in place.

      "So it was you fucking in my bed?" It took me a split second to realize he was talking to me and my eyes nearly popped out of my head.

     "No! Nononono. Someone put me down in there while I was still unconscious. Uh- I- I'm sorry," my cheeks burned and I could hear the soft snorts of laughter coming from the people around me. I wanted to give them all a good smack. His face was still expressionless, but there was a small twitch of a muscle in his cheek.

     "I'm joking, brat. But, seriously, you could've at least smoothed the sheets back out before you left." He huffed and turned to leave. "I'll be in my quarters. If you need me, find someone else who gives a shit," and with that said, he retreated to his room.

     Farlan and Izzy shook their hands chuckling and Farlan muttered, "That's the classic Levi for you." Petra just shook her head and tched at his behavior. My friends and I still weren't sure how to feel about him. They were pretty fond of the rest of the band, however. Mikasa and Petra went back to talking while the trio on the other side of the room continued their game.

      Izzy handed over the controller to Armin after she died for the fifteenth time. She grinned and wagged her eyebrows as she told him, "Go find the strip club," a pause, "and kill one of the hoes for her money. I'm low on cash." Armin and I blinked, staring at the girl. "What? It's funny. Look." She took the controller back and made her avatar run over to an old man. My jaw dropped when she started beating the shit out of the elderly man. Due to a glitch in the game, though, the old man started sinking into the floor and they started laughing at how creepy it was. Armin didn't protest when she offered the controller again. I rolled my eyes chuckling and sighed when I was finished. ' _I never want to go home._ '

     Despite only being with these people for about an hour, it was the happiest I'd been in a long time. I felt laid back here. Like nothing had ever happened before coming here. Like I was safe. Unfortunately, I didn't feel totally laid back. Levi still scared the piss out of me, quite literally in fact. My bladder decided it was time to invest a few minutes in a bathroom. I stood up asking where the bathroom was. Petra nodded her head in the direction of the hallway.

     "It's actually in Levi's room. He shouldn't mind." I held back a groan and considered just holding it in until we left. My body didn't plan on letting me have my way, however, and I ended up making my way to his habitat. Before my knuckles reached the wood, Levi's voice drifted through the door and I ceased all movement. The air was filled with the melody of an acoustic guitar and the smooth silvery sounds coming from his lips. I recognized the song after he sang two more lines.

_It's the way I wait_

_It's the way you've changed_

      My eyes closed and I let my hand fall to my side.

_And I like the way you hurt inside_

_Always waiting for the worst to get me by_

_And I like the way you hurt._

_It doesn't really come_

_Doesn't really come as a surprise._

      At some point I must have started singing, because suddenly the door flew open and Levi was standing there, guitar in one hand, the door handle in the other. Warmth crept up my neck once again but I shooed it away quickly.

     "In case you weren't aware, it's rude to eavesdrop, kid." His features didn't help me decide if he was angry or not, but I got the feeling he was irritated by the way he tapped his index finger against the neck of the guitar.

     "I-I'm sorry. I just came back to ask to use the bathroom a-and I heard you singing and didn't want to interrupt," I rushed out. I was a total nervous wreck around this guy. He shook his head at me.

      "You'd rather listen to me sing than relieve your bladder?" I shrugged looking at the space between us.

      "I mean, there'll be plenty of chances to pee, but only one to hear you sing like that." His eyebrows raised and his head bobbed up and down slowly with approval of my answer.

      "Point taken," he let go of the door to walk back to his bed, "Bathroom is to the right." He set the guitar down on its stand as I quickly entered his room and headed straight for the bathroom. I opened the door and was met with a rack of girl's clothing. My face scrunched into confusion at the unexpected sight. There was a snort behind me. "Your other right. That's Izzy's and Petra's closet." My face turned into a complete inferno when I saw a bra sticking out on the top shelf. I shut the closet door faster than the speed of light and practically flew to the other door, slipping inside before he could see my face. ' _Wow. I just managed to make myself look like a total idiot within a matter of seconds. I think I just set a new personal high score.'_

     I took care of my business with record timing after taking a deep breath and trying to collect myself. I stared at myself in the mirror, checking to see if the red had extinguished itself off my face. Thankfully it was back to my normal tanned skin tone. At this point it was more than tempting to crawl out the little window above the toilet. With a great amount of self-encouragement, though, I pushed myself to leave the room. 

      He was sitting cross-legged on the sheets, his fingers tapping away at his phone. When I began to turn to the exit, he looked up at me from his device and beckoned me over with a curl of his finger. My eyes were once again wrapped up in the depths of his own, my feet moving forward to their own accord. He silently told me to sit with a tip of his head. I followed his command, and when I sat down, my feet were dangling off the edge. 

     "So, tell me something," he began with his lips pursed, "Where did you learn to sing like that?" I immediately looked down at my legs.

      "I don't understand what you mean. Sing like what? I mean, my mom and I used to have karaoke parties every weekend. We were totally bad ass," I joked nervously. He gave me a flat look, unamused. 

      "That's not what I meant, brat, and you know it." ' _Shit_.' "I heard you singing along with me and you can't tell me you've never had a voice coach or something. You've got some talent, kid." I huffed in frustration. Sure, I had a decent voice and all. I used to love singing more than anything. When Armin stayed the night at my house and he had a nightmare or if it was storming, I'd sing for him and he'd fall asleep almost instantly. After I was found in the field and returned home, I refused to sing anymore. Not without her... 

      "Look, I've never had one. Nothing. Nada. And you barely heard me. And it was through a door. I could actually sound like shit for all you know," I said with a frown. Levi pursed his lips together and narrowed his eyes. 

       "Fine. Let's say I think you sound like shit," he leaned over to grab his guitar from its stand, "Prove me wrong." I sighed, taking it he wasn't about to let the topic drop until I gave in.

     '' ** _Always sing for me, Eren. Your voice brings me happiness_** ," my mother's voice echoed in the back of my mind. I tried not to flinch and barely succeeded. To rid anymore thoughts from entering my brain, I shook my head and sat up a little straighter when his nimble fingers began to pluck at the strings. The rhythm of the song was fast paced and I realized the song was 'On my Own' by Ashes Remain. I took a mental note that he liked to play their songs.

     My nerves were slowly building up and I attempted to pacify them by taking a deep breath. It didn't help one bit. He began strumming and I took that as my cue. 

_ There's gotta be another way out  _

_ I've been sticking in a cage with my doubt  _

_ I've tried forever getting out on my own.  _

     A calming sensation washed over me and suddenly I felt free. When my vocal chords vibrated, it gave me a small thrill each time, making me realize just how badly I'd missed the feeling. I tipped my head back towards the sky and closed my eyes. 

_ Bring me out.  _

_ Come and find me in the dark now  _

_ Everyday by myself I'm breaking down.  _

_ I don't wanna fight alone anymore.  _

_ Bring me out  _

_ Of the prison of my own pride  _

_ My god I need a hope I can't deny.  _

_ In the end I'm realizing _

_ I was never meant to fight on my own.  _

     He stopped playing and I cracked open my eyes to see his reaction. His pupils were hidden by his eyelids, but there was a barely detectable curve at the corners of his lips. His two lip rings were twisting around in circles from his tongue, his shirt hugged his toned body tighter when he took in a big pool of air, and his thumb slowly rubbed against the polished wood beneath his fingertips. He was most certainly a beautiful piece of art. His eyes opened to meet mine and he slowly bobbed his head in approval. 

      "Like I said before, you've got some talent, kid. Have you considered turning it into a career?" I shrugged my shoulders pretending to be super interested in my fingernails. Sure I had, a while back. Before some higher power had decided to take a giant shit on my life, anyways. It unnerved me to talk, or even think, about my future. Used to, I loved thinking about how I'd turn out when I got closer to being eighteen. Now, I feared it. I received a grim reminder whenever I thought about the future that no one was in control of it. 

      He was about to say something but stopped when his eyes landed on my hand. I raised an eyebrow at him and looked down at his subject of focus. "What?" I inquired. 

      Levi dipped his head at my hands suggesting, "You should redo your nails. They look unkempt." My shoulders lifted in a helpless shrug. 

      "I suck at painting nails. I've always had Mikasa do them for me. She's been busy with work lately, though, and I don't want to bother her on her days off." Remembering the first time I tried to paint my own nails made me mentally snort. Somehow black paint had ended up all over my body, and Mikasa spent a solid three hours scrubbing it all off. 

      He clicked his tongue as he leaned over to set the guitar back in its place and yanked open the bedside table's drawer. He got out a small glass container of black nail polish and turned back around to face me. 

      "I'll fix them. Kick off your shoes and scoot up closer," he commanded. I obeyed, slipping off my shoes and crossing my legs like his. "You expect me to reach over two feet away as I fix your nails? Scoot up, brat." I gritted my teeth to hold back the warmth fighting its way to my cheeks while I shifted closer to him. Our knees barely grazed against each other's, but it was enough to send little sparks of joy through my bones. He wrapped his hand around my left one to place it in his lap, and I more or less turned into a stick of dynamite. Whether he was unaware of my mental breakdown or just didn't care, he focused on the task at hand and got to work immediately.  We sat in silence as he worked, until I decided to make small talk to pass the time. 

       "So, when did you all form the band?" I stared down at him while his small physique was hunched over. One of his eyebrows popped up and he tilted his head up in the slightest to look at me as if I had just told him pigs could grow gills and swim in the ocean. He shook his head at himself and continued working. 

      "I was just taken aback that you didn't know already. Most of our fans like to brag about how much they know about us. I've actually never been asked anything like that from a fan. Just in interviews. But, ah, anyways. We got together when I was eighteen and they were seventeen, and we've been a band for five years now." 

      "That makes you, what, twenty three? And they're all twenty two." He nodded and asked a question of his own.

      "And how old are you? Fifteen?" I gave him a flat look when he glanced up to gauge my reaction. A smirk made one of the corners of his lips curl upwards. 

       "No," I snapped, "I'm seventeen." He nodded slowly, his emotionless expression returning, and chewed on his lip rings. It took all I had not to reach out and trace my thumb along the edge of his bottom lip. Once I realized I was staring, I jerked away my focus to my nails. He was on my right hand now, finishing up the middle finger. 

      "Do you want me to do the middle finger red? I do that with mine because it stands out more when I flip people off." His smirk made another appearance, this one wider than the last. I couldn't hold back a smile so I gave up and nodded my head to accompany the grin. "Alright. Also, I hope smoking doesn't bother you. If it does, then feel free to leave. Just a heads up," he shrugged as he brushed on the red paint. I shook my head and mimicked the shrug of his shoulders. 

       "I'm okay with it. I mean, I'm not really okay with it. I'm just used to it so I don't mind." 

       "Parents smoke?" I tried not to wince. 

       "Dad used to, yeah." He nodded his head with an 'ah'. 

       I glimpsed downwards to check on how much was left to do. Both hands were done, so after he finished up the pinky, he picked up both of my hands to check his work. With a small nod of approval from himself, he turned them in my direction and I inspected my nails closely. Each one was evenly covered, not a bump found on any of them. My eyebrows shot up and I bobbed my head, pleased with the new coating. "Thanks, Levi."

       He gave me an unreadable look before pursing his lips and bowing his head. "No problem, kid." 

      "It's Eren," I corrected him. 

      "I don't care, _kid,_ " he said with a wink and smirk. I shook my head at all of the mixed signalssignalscoming in at once and stood up just as Mikasa and Armin walked in. "Tch. And here I thought it was only this brat that didn't know how to knock," he sighed with a small shake of his head. Armin began to apologize but gave up when Mikasa interrupted.

      "We're in a hurry, sorry," she deadpanned, not really sounding sorry at all and turned to me, "It's almost eight, Eren." My eyes widened and I was immediately scampering to the door, grabbing my shoes on the way. I followed behind my friends, but was stopped when I was about to shut the door.

      "Hey," Levi called. I swung my head over my shoulder to see him wave. "See you around, Eren." I blinked at him, going on autopilot while my mind memorized the way my name sounded on his lips. I quickly recovered, however, when Mikasa yelled for me to hurry up and I left him a small smile and a "see you". 

      It didn't even matter if I was late now. 

      Hearing him say my name was enough to make me forget about the painful consequences I'd receive if I came home even one minute past my curfew.

      It was _all_  worth it. 

      And attending that concert was the _best_ idea ever.


	4. Groceries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I originally wanted to have a lot more happen in this chapter. But I think I'm gonna swing it another way ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° I'm rude I'm sorry. But now that school crap is done and my friends are too busy to invite me over every day, I can finally sit and write. For now, here's thissss

_Eren_

 

 

We made it home last night with three minutes to spare. To my frustration though, as I was getting in the shower I'd noticed something was missing from my pocket still. I knew there was no way I'd ever get my phone back now. It was just a matter of time before my foster parents found out. The father figure, Don, would undoubtedly raise hell when he discovered it was gone. Meanwhile, the "mom" came home maybe once or twice a week. She was always busy with work so she wouldn't know. There was nothing standing in his way of doing what he saw fit.

 I thought he'd found out the next morning. He yelled for me downstairs while I was still asleep, and I irritatedly glanced over at the clock's blinding blue lights through my bleary vision. ' _Hahahaha. 6:00AM. Fuck me. Fuck this. Fuck you, Don.'_ I threw the comforters away, my body shuddering from the biting cold breeze. Don always kept the house at freezing temperatures, and if anyone complained they'd get a boot to the exit.

When I reached the bottom of the stairs the man handed the home phone over to me with an angry glare. I took the phone from him, immediately retreating back to the safety of my room. Hesitantly, I brought the phone up to my ear while sitting back down on the bed.

"Um, hello?"

"Eren?" the voice on the other end said back. My eyebrows met in the middle as I tried to pinpoint the voice. Perhaps it was just some telemarketer.

"This is him. If this is some ad or promotion I'm not--"

"Ad or promotion? Shut your hole for a second, brat," suddenly I realized it was Levi from the annoying nickname and his impatient huff. I did as the man commanded and zipped my lips. "I have your phone. Meet me in front of the red and blue grocery store down the road from where our concert was. That clear?"

"Yeah. Crystal," I sighed in relief. Just as Levi said bye and was about to hang up, I rushed out, "Wait! Wait wait wait. What time?" I could practically hear him rolling his eyes.

"As soon as possible. As in now. Don't keep me waiting forever." I muttered an 'okay' and tossed the device on my bed. I took no more than five minutes getting dressed, taking care of my normal morning duties, and returning to the kitchen to replace the phone on its receiver. Don was no where in sight so at first I assumed he'd gone back to sleep. However, my eye caught a slip of paper lying on our marble countertop beside a bowl of apples. A grimace stretched across my face as I read the chicken scrawl on the note. **'Went out shopping for Mother's day. Have the chores done by the time I get home.** '

I weighed the consequences of him finding out I didn't have my phone and not having the chores done by the time he was home. I concluded it'd be worse to have him find out the cellular device was missing and without debating further on the matter, I left the opulent two story home. Mikasa was already at work so I made sure to turn on the security alarms.

I had the suspicion there were a few cameras set up around the house, which wouldn't surprise me if Don ever confirmed it. They were more or less rich. Well, very very wealthy would be a more appropriate term. Needless to say, Mikasa and I felt out of place compared to our original shabby, but comfortable, home.

It took approximately five minutes to jog down to the grocery store. I scanned the parking lot as I stepped foot onto the pavement but didn't find Levi anywhere. After a minute of searching though, I spotted the person I'd come to see. He leaned against the glass window, beside a trash can, smoking half a cigarette. His gaze seemed unfocused like his mind wasn't all there and his lips were curved down at the corners. The look piqued my interest. He always seemed to have an impassive face. It reminded me of how my friends used to complain about how I'd constantly space out after I'd been kidnapped. I made sure I hid them now.

"Hi," I greeted him with a polite smile. His eyes snapped back to focus up at me. 

Instead of replying, he tipped his head to acknowledge my presence after taking a long drag of his cigarette. While he blew the smoke from his ample lips, his hand held out the cancer stick to me in offering. My face scrunched up and I turned it down, shaking my head. He shrugged and finished off what was left before speaking.

"Took you long enough. I think I might have a gray hair or two now," he said with a 'tch' at the end and a shake of his head in mock disappointment. I did my best to give him a 'does it look like I give a shit' face, but it ended up tuning into a smile. I wasn't normally a morning person, but I think mornings would be a little bit better if they were always like this.

"Oh, no. God forbid two white hairs ever showing on your precious little head," I said sarcastically and placed a hand over my heart, pretending as if I were about to faint, "Let's go shave it all off before more start to grow." His eyes shot lightning bolts at me when my hand came near his arm to pull him to the nearest barber.

"Do that, you die," he practically hissed, "Don't start getting cheeky with me, brat." It was hard to hold back a laugh. The man looked like an angry troll. Levi turned to walk inside but didn't move forward. It looked like he wanted to say more but nothing came out.

I realized during our moment of silence, something felt different about me. The dark box I normally felt trapped inside was missing. I felt a bit like my old self.

"For a fun-sized guy, you aren't any fun," I pouted crossing my arms across my chest. In an instant, my leg was kicked out from under me and a hand caught the collar of my shirt to stop me from hitting the ground. I gaped wide-eyed up at Levi while his face was just an inch away from mine, his raven bangs lightly sweeping across my face. My body involuntarily shivered at the small contact.

"You should watch your tongue, brat. This 'fun-sized guy' still has your phone hostage," he smirked at my surprised expression. I could feel his breath when he spoke and I was painfully aware of how close we were. How close our eyes were. How close our noses were. How close our lips were. ' _My God he's beautiful.'_

When he noticed where my line of sight had traveled, he yanked me back up to a standing position and turned away.

"As punishment I'm making you come along with me to find groceries." One of my eyebrows escalated.

"As punishment?" I said in an inquiring tone. To me, punishment meant something far worse than grocery shopping with an attractive man. If this what Levi considered punishment, I wouldn't mind being punished by him more often. "Okay... Fine. As long as I get my phone back," I shrugged and followed him inside, picking up a basket when we reached the automatic doors.

Levi walked a few steps ahead with his arms crossed over his chest, his leather jacket straining over his back. He paused to toss in a container of peanut butter, nutella, and a jar of pickles. I shook my head at the combo wrinkling my nose up at it. He simply ignored my reaction and continued on.

He turned around a few times mumbling something about oranges. When he found them, they just so happened to be on the top shelf. Levi had to stand on his tippy toes to reach for the jar of oranges. He was still too short to grasp it and I couldn't help the smile growing on my face. I began to take a step forward to help him, but received a 'don't you dare' glare as soon as I lifted a finger.

After a couple of minutes of silently chuckling at the sight of him struggling, I gave up on staying back and stepped up to reach over him to retrieve the item. He lightly leaned against me when my chest brushed against the small of his back and our arms came in contact. My face warmed up, but as soon as I put the oranges in with the other groceries, he stalked off in the direction of the chips and soda aisle and my cheeks cooled down.

"Pick out a couple bags of chips. I don't have the slightest clue what they want me to get." It took me a moment to process he'd said 'they', but once it clicked my eyebrows shot up as a grin fell on my face.

"Ahhh, so they made you do the grocery shopping for them? And let me guess. You didn't know what to get so you dragged me along?" Instead of replying, he threw a bored expression over his shoulder at me and grunted. I picked up on the way his eyes narrowed a fraction of an inch, however. I knew I was right. He'd most likely been tossing random stuff in the basket. I smiled shaking my head and began picking out chips, snacks, and supplies to make sandwiches. The rest of the time he stayed quiet, his eyes unfocused, leaving me to wonder what he was thinking about. The man always had on an emotionless mask.

We went through the self check-out lane to save time since only one cash register was open, a long line formed wrapping around a shelf of sweets. He quickly swiped the groceries over the scanner that put the cashier to shame.

Right before Levi scanned the last few items, I told him to wait a second and jogged away to the international aisle. One of his eyebrows lifted when I came back carrying two boxes of chocolate pocky.

"They make good snacks," I told him, scanning the items and proceeding to throw them in a plastic bag. He swiped his card to pay, I grabbed the bags, and we found our way to the parking lot. My feet stopped moving as I searched for his ride. "Where's the bus?" The vehicle was no where to be seen.

"We checked into a hotel right across the street so I just walked," he explained while marching towards a busy intersection. I spotted the hotel across the street and jogged a few feet to catch up to Levi, and surprisingly he decelerated his stride to let me walk comfortably beside him. He had a natural fast paced walk that made it frustrating to remain by his side sometimes. It was almost nice, though- the feeling of pushing myself forward to keep up with someone.

It was a miniscule thing that shouldn't have made me feel like there was hope, but it itched at my skin, crawling its way inside like a parasite. Something inside me felt like it was beginning to tear. Partly torn between wanting to fight to live and torn between the feelings I'd grown accustomed to the past few months- fear, helplessness, shame, depression.

I could still feel the ropes around my wrists, the sun boiling my skin, my throat so dry I couldn't scream anymore. I could clearly remember the way the bucket of cool water felt pouring down on my blistered skin at sunset. They did it every night, but only let me drink once a week. Twice if they were feeling generous.

Just a week before I was found, I'd been fully prepared to die. I was convinced everyone had given up on me. That I'd die bound to the earth and no one would ever find me. That feeling never left.

"Oi! The fuck are you doing?" a panicked voice cut through my reverie. I slowly twisted my head around in a daze to get a glimpse of Levi before a hand gripped my wrist roughly and yanked me backwards. Fear choked my lungs as a flash of the memory of being torn away from my friends crossed my mind. A car horn blared then sped by us, and my eyes widened as I goggled around me, finally brought back to reality. We were at a stand still beside the intersection.

Levi looked up at me with his eyebrows knitted together in a mixture of concern and anger, his hand still locked around my wrist. I suddenly felt boxed in, suffocated, and I began to panic. My hand jerked away from Levi's hold and I wanted to run. I wasn't safe there. I needed to get away. I needed to find Mikasa. Or Armin. I needed to--

"Stop, Eren." My eyes focused back on the man in front of me. My body wouldn't move. His eyes absorbed me in a way that didn't make me feel suffocated or trapped. Every bad thing felt like it was melting away into a puddle around my feet. A weight was taken out of my left hand- the groceries- and in its place was warmth. "Let's go, brat."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its a pain in the ass updating using a tablet ¬_¬ I need my laptop back


	5. Tea and Trouble

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's more for your souls ~

_Eren_ __

  


Once I was calmed down completely, we'd already made it to the hotel and I was sitting on the bed in Levi's room while he brewed tea. It only took a couple of minutes before the water came to a slow boil, and he placed a tea bag in each glass of water he poured. I wasn't the biggest fan of tea, but it wasn't god awful. And I most certainly wasn't going to complain. 

He brought the two mugs over to the bedside table before retuning to the kitchen.

"Sugar?" Levi questioned craning his head around to see me nod my head. He snatched up a couple fancy coasters and packets of sugar and tossed them at me. I caught the coasters, but the packets bounced off my lap and into the floor. With a huff, I set down the two wooden cup holders on the table and began to reach down for the sugar. My fingers didn't even brush the surface of them before a hand appeared to scoop them up. 

"I'm capable of picking things up on my own," I deadpanned as I sat upright again. He smirked and tapped the packets on my nose, resulting in a shake of my head while leaning away.

"Oh I know. Trust me, I saw the way that old lady was checking you out in aisle nine. I'm sure she was ready to have some fun with her walking cane," he winked with a smirk which elicited an unstoppable wide ass grin from me.

"You're just jealous I can get some and you can't," I teased and waved my hand before taking back the packets of sugar. It was the flat out opposite. He could probably have anyone he wanted while I remained in a relationship with myself and my bedroom. 

His smirk grew and his body began to inch towards me, resulting in me leaning back all the way, my eyes wide, back pressed against the mattress. He didn't stop until our noses were an inch or less apart, his words as light as a whisper. 

"Maybe. Or maybe there's a certain 'some' from someone I want but don't have permission to have," his stormy eyes were smoldering and I was once again wrapped inside them, barely able to process his words. I swallowed nervously and took a deep shuddering breath, daring a quick glance down at his lips. _'Would they be soft? Or sweet from the tea? Or faintly chapped from running around in the sun constantly?'_

"Who the fuck wouldn't give you permission?," I blurted. I bit my lips and looked away at the tea cup resting on the table. My entire face felt like it was enveloped in fire. ' _Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Why did I fucking say that? Shit. I'm so--_ -' 

A chuckle came from the man above me and I sharply inhaled at the sound. _'Perhaps I was hallucinating. ._ .' 

My gaze slipped back up to Levi and there was indeed a grin plastered on his face. For a moment I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. I was afraid to move because I didn't want that smile to disappear. I wasn't even sure how I'd made him laugh other than possibly my impulsive stupidity which most people, including myself, found irritating. 

"You'd be pretty damn surprised," he shook his head and began to roll away. Before he could peel himself away from me, the toilet flushed, the door to the bathroom opened, and Farlan's eyes met Levi's and then mine.

A devilish grin appeared on his face and his arms crossed over his chest. I sat up to taste test the tea before pouring in both packets of sugar to sweeten it up to my standards. While I sipped my tea, I watched as the two began to banter. 

"Well well well. Now who was it that said I shouldn't fuck around?" he gave Levi a pointed look. Levi simply rolled his eyes, the smile gone from the moment Farlan had entered the room, and sat down about a foot away from me. 

"Damn sure it wasn't me. I just told you to stop fucking groupies in my bed. Now if you don't mind," he pointed a finger at the door, "The exit is that way. And next time you clog your own toilet, ask someone at the front desk for help instead of using mine. You do this every fucking time we're in a hotel." Levi's lips were pressed into a thin line, his eyes narrowed. His irritation seemed to be seeping through the air almost tangible. 

"Of course, your majesty," Farlan said sarcastically in an English accent and bowed for the extra effect. He made it almost all the way out of the room before he stuck his head back in. "Cute laugh by the way," he jabbed playfully with a wiggle of his eyebrows. Levi snatched a pillow from behind me and chucked it at the spot where Farlan's head disappeared. There was a click of the door and laughter fading as he walked away. 

I tried to cover up my own giggles with a cough over my shoulder then set down the empty cup. The man beside me sighed, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose.

"He gives me the worst headaches I swear," he shook his head and leant back to lay beside me. I watched him from the corner of my eye, but pieces of my dark brown hair blocked the full view. His eyes shifted to catch my gaze, all traces of irritation gone. They remained steely and cold, but there was no stress there anymore. 

"So," he began, "Wanna explain why you attempted to become the world's flattest pancake at that intersection?" My eyes snapped away to stare at the wall before I closed them with a heavy sigh. He deserved something, but he most definitely wasn't getting a full explanation. 

I hardly knew this man, and after today I wouldn't see him again anyways, as depressing as that thought was. He was a famous rockstar and I was a nobody.

"Not really to be honest," I mumbled chewing on the corner of my lips. "I just zoned out I guess." It was the truth, I had zoned out. All the way into the recess of my nightmares.

"Tch. No one just 'zones out' so much they walk into oncoming traffic, kid," he deadpanned with his eyes narrowed and left the bed to clear away the two cups- one empty, one still full. Instead of pouring out his tea like I assumed was his motive, he tipped the cup back and consumed half of the contents. "You don't have to explain. Just don't make it a goal of yours to become road kill," he raised the cup back to his lips then paused and added, "Mother of hell I can only imagine the mess. . ." 

I snorted softly at him while he finished off the tea and washed the glass within just a minute. Becoming roadkill wasn't exactly in my agenda. However, the dishes triggered a memory in the back of my mind and I realized with paralyzing fear that I'd forgotten about my chores back home. My head dropped into my hands, a quiet groan escaping my lips. _'I'm so dead.'_

"I need to go," I sighed swallowing a lump in my throat and practically power walked to the door, whizzing past Levi on my way there.

"Hey. Aren't you forgetting something?" I turned around to raise an eyebrow at the man, but instead ended up scrambling to catch two small objects he tossed to me. One was my phone and the other a box of Pocky. After a long breath of relief, I flashed him a small smile. 

"Thank y--." 

"Don't mention it," he waved my gratitude away and leaned back against the counter taking a couple more swigs of his tea. His cheeks were slightly tinged red and I briefly wondered if it was from the tea being too hot or something else.

My phone began vibrating in my hand, signaling a phone call. My eyes widened a fraction of an inch at the caller ID: **Don**. 

The exit was right beside the kitchen, and it was more than difficult now to force myself to open the door. Clearing my throat, I swung open the door and as I crossed into the hallway of the hotel I heard Levi say, "Farewell, kid."

  


×------------------×

  


"Eren Jaeger, where the hell have you been?" Don had yelled at me. As soon as I'd gotten home, the day seemed to darken. I was expecting that, but no matter how many times I tried to build up thicker walls around myself to prepare myself for it, it just never seemed to be enough to keep me from being hurt in the end. 

I'd told him I'd just gone to the store to get a snack. He wasn't stupid, though. My ears turned red from the lie while I mentally kicked myself for not thinking that through. 

Mikasa must've been upstairs in her room or the gym, because she never once came in the living room where I'd stood, waiting to be punished. Don shook his head with a growl before walking the other way muttering, "At least your goddamn chores are done. Why can't you be like him. . . ? Worthless piece of shit."

Now I sat in my room mulling over his words. 

I was a piece of shit. I was a disappointment. I was worthless. I hated feeling this way. A part of me felt like I deserved to feel this way while the other couldn't help silently begging to be happy.

I was a waste of space. I was unproductive. I was a mistake. My fingers threaded through tousels of my hair, making it even messier than it was to begin with. ' _Why did it end up this way? What the fuck did I do in the past life to end up like this?'_

I flicked on the TV louder than necessary, flopped back on my bed to press a pillow into my face, and screamed until my lungs hurt. 

The closest I'd gotten to feeling hopeful was while I was with Levi. Now that I'd had a taste of what hope felt like, I just wanted that small shred of warm happiness back instead of this empty, hollow feeling I'd grown accustomed to. 

For the next couple of hours, I listened to nothing but Lying In Filth's four albums on YouTube before I finally drifted to sleep from emotional exhaustion.


	6. Hope

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont know what happened. This story is just starting to flow with me now. Not sure if that's a good thing orr xD

_Eren_

 

 

It'd been two months since Lying In Filth left town to finish their tour. During those two months I got a job at a guitar shop (Mikasa more or less kidnapped me and forced me into the interview), Armin wasn't around as much, and Mikasa was getting out of the house more often. I was left on my own to think for those two months. Left to ponder the idea of actually trying to be happy. I came up with two ideas during that period of time.

The first: since I was 18 I could move out, and I'd without a doubt be happier. But it just wasn't that easy. Mikasa was still a year younger than I so she couldn't leave the foster home yet. And there wasn't a chance in hell I'd leave her behind with the pieces of trash that took us in. My sister had been through thick and thin with me. So that idea was blown out of the water.

The second was a long shot, but going on the small fraction of hope Levi had given me, I had more determination than I'd ever had to run with the idea. I decided to sing professionally. Maybe in a band or just solo. I hadn't decided yet. However, it was about time I started fighting again, and I knew I had to be the one to push myself back into the war.

____

 

"Eren relax. It's a small crowd, there's only twenty people or so. You'll be perfectly fine, okay?" Mikasa's hands rested on my shoulders in a comforting manner. This would be the first time I'd sing in front of a crowd. My palms were clammy, making it difficult to hold the microphone. The grip on it never loosened.

I'd only sang to mom, Armin, Mikasa, and Levi. Just a one on one audience. Now there were over twenty people here to hear my voice. It almost made me feel self-conscious.

I nodded my head and took slow breaths like the stage manager of the café had shown me earlier. My eyes were shut, eyebrows furrowed. I needed to concentrate to push my nerves aside so I wouldn't choke on stage. It was difficult to; especially when this was the café that your foster parents often went to. If they caught me, I'd be fucked over backwards. They both despised the music I loved. The only way I could listen to the stuff I liked was with a pair of headphones and the lowest volume possible.

What made the whole situation crappy was this was the only café with a stage in our city. There was no where else to perform besides the streets.

Armin had offered the idea I cover the top half of my face with black bandages. Ones where I could see the crowd, but they couldn't see me. As an after thought, he suggested a change of style to make me more unrecognizable.

Since I normally wore bright colors and blue jeans around the house to keep the two adults from complaining about wearing too much black clothing, they never saw me in my old getup. I whipped out some old clothing items from the back of my closet- a plain white v-neck, a leather jacket with studs, thigh high laced boots, and black ripped skinny jeans accompanied with a few band bracelets and a studded collar was all I needed for tonight.

Mikasa adjusted the bandages one last time before she patted my cheek and left the backstage with a hushed 'good luck'. The speakers boomed a few seconds later with the announcer's voice coming through. In the few seconds the announcer took to introduce me, I threaded my fingers through my hair to sweep the brown locks back in hopes of taming it a little better. While I shuffled my designated spot, something like a wave of serenity blanketed me, draining out all the tension in my limbs.

I took my place behind the curtains, center stage.

A beat of silence passed.

And another.

Then the veils were drawn aside and I made my way up the stage into the spotlight, trying to stay cool.

My nerves were creeping back into my system as the intro of the song played, but when I began to sing I could feel the adrenaline and excitement take over everything.

_I’m just the boy inside the man, not exactly who you think I am_

_Trying to trace my steps back here again so many times_

_I’m just a speck inside your hand, you came and made me who I am_

_I remember where it all began so clearly_

The corners of my lips quirked up into a smile from the thrill of my voice being echoed through the speakers.

_I feel a million miles away, still you connect me in your wayway_

_And you create in me something I would’ve never seen_

_When I could only see the floor, you made my window a doo_ _rdoor_

_So when they say they don’t believe, I hope that they see you in me_

_After all the lights go down, I’m just the words you are the sound_

_A strange type of chemistry, how you’ve become a part of me_

For some reason, in that moment, Levi's face intruded my mind. The joy in his eyes in those few seconds somehow stuck itself to the insides of my eyelids like duct tape.

_And when I sit alone at night, your thoughts burn through me like a fire_

_You’re the only one who knows who I really am._

_We all wanna be somebody, we just need a taste of who we are._

_We all wanna be somebody, we’re willing to go but not that far._

From then throughout the rest of the song, my mind was cleared of any stray thoughts.

_I’m just the boy inside the man, not exactly who you think I am_

_Trying to trace my steps back here again so many times_

_When I could only see the floor, you made my window a door_

_So when they say they don’t believe, I hope that they see you in me._

Customers clapped, whistled, and there were even a couple of woot's from a group of guys drinking who looked maybe a little bit older than I. I gave a small short wave to everyone before scampering off back stage to meet Mikasa and Armin with hugs.

"I'm so proud of you, Eren. You did--"

"Amazing! You were perfect!" Armin finished for Mikasa. She gave the blonde a halfhearted glare, to which he rubbed sheepishly at the back of his neck, but her frown was almost instantly replaced with a wide smile. "I've missed your voice, Eren. . .," Armin wrapped me into another tight hug, nearly squeezing the life out of me.

"Like he said. And I told you it'd be okay," she chuckled softly, unwrapping the bandages when Armin let go and handed me a spare change of clothes. It sucked having to change back into the basic style I had to wear for my "parents". I just looked like a basic snobby rich kid.

I didn't argue, though, and as soon as I was changed and paid a thanks to the owner, we three left the café. For the first couple minutes of the walk back home, everyone was quiet. Armin was the first, as always, to break that silence.

"So uhm, Eren?" I gazed at him from the corner of my eyes with a quirked eyebrow, "Mikasa and I have something we need to talk to you about." He paused to give her an unsure look.

She cleared her throat, "We should go to the park and talk there. We still have an hour before we have to be home." My eyebrows mashed together in confusion, but I continued to walk with them towards the park.

It was about eight at night so the temperature had thankfully dropped several degrees. I was not a fan of the extreme heat during summers here. It was as hot as Satan's left ballsack.

The walk was silent once again, but it only took about five minutes to get to the set of swings we always sat at. They were sectioned off from the rest of the park, giving it a secluded feeling. Since there were only four, no one normally sat beside us.

Mikasa sat on the wooden barrier around the set while Armin took a seat on one of the swings. I plopped down in the one beside his and they immediately got down to the point.

"We want to start a band," Armin spoke up, looking me squarely in the eye. For a moment I was taken aback at the sudden proposal. They hadn't ever mentioned anything about wanting to join or make a band. I cocked an eyebrow, slowly looking between the two as if seeing them for the first time.

"Do what?" was all I said. It was all I could manage to say to his proposal.

"We want to start a band, Eren. We've been working our asses off and constantly practicing in Armin's garage. We've even had a few friends listen. We're getting really good and Jean even offered to--"

"No."

Mikasa's eyebrows met in the middle in confusion at my sudden answer. "What?"

"You know how I feel about that Jean guy, Mikasa. I get pissed off just looking at him. And you shouldn't do this just to help me out. I'm really thankful you are so much. But I can just find a band who needs a singer. It's okay. Don't waste your time learning something you don't really want to--"

"Fuck, Eren, shut up!" Armin shouted. The blonde blinked in shock and covered his mouth with a hand at his language. Mikasa's and my eyebrows shot up in unison surprise at his outburst. He cleared his throat mumbling quietly, "I'm sorry. I just don't want you to feel like this is all just for you. Because it's not, Eren. . . We want this. I've always wanted to be on a big stage playing the drums."

"And I've always wanted to create music to be able to share how I feel. You know I've never been good at helping people or giving advice. I feel like writing music is the perfect solution for that. I've been learning to play the bass for the past two months. I have a natural feel for it."

I breathed in deeply to give their idea one last thought. "And Jean?"

Armin explained with a grimace, "He overheard us in the garage and noticed we didn't have a guitarist. He said he'd been practicing guitar for over twelve years and has been in four different bands, but they all ended up going no where so he left them. He offered to join so we told him we'd consider it."

A heavy sigh left my lips as I continued to question the two, "Okay, okay. So how do you expect us to get anywhere? If Jean decides we're no better than the others then he'll leave as soon as he joins."

"Trust me, Eren. When I said we've been practicing hard, I damn straight meant it. And there's a band contest coming up in three months. We already have four applications. The winner gets signed by the Survey Regiment Records," she announced grinning.

I gave her a flat look.

"Never heard of them," I sighed a second time that evening and stood up stretching, "Look, I'll think about it alright?"

"SRR is the record company Lying In Filth is signed to," she added in. At that, I froze mid-stretch. Could we really pull this off? The only really experienced player was Jean. And he could drop us at any time. Plus there's only three months to practice. But what if we did make it? We could get out of this shit hole. We could leave the past behind us. We could see the fucking world for god's sake. And I could see Levi again. . .

I closed my eyes and sighed for the final time that night, but with a small smile on my face.

"When's our first practice?"

_______

 

_◎1 Day Later◎_

 

"Jean you're off beat again," I called over the echoing sounds of the instruments. He cursed and Mikasa and Armin ceased playing to restart for the seventh time. As it turned out, Jean had a rough time keeping up with the rhythm. Mikasa and Armin played better than expected. They actually sounded almost professional when all three bandmates were in sync.

"Okay, Jean, follow the rhythm of my drum sticks," Armin ordered and clapped his sticks in a slow beat. Jean joined in, playing a random song along with the rhythm of the sticks. He slowly sped up the beat and the two-toned looking horse followed suit. With a nod of approval from Armin, they began the song again.

This time, it was perfect.

I grinned rather excitedly, unable to contain my giddiness. This was actually happening. They're getting better so quickly.

"Okay, guys, let's take a break," I yelled over the music and jogged inside to get some drinks and the applications for the contest. When I came back out, the three were sitting in a circle laughing at Armin telling some story about when he started learning to play drums his stick flew out of his hand somehow and stabbed him right in the forehead. I shook my head with a chuckle and set down the drinks taking a seat next to the blonde and Mikasa.

"Here's the applications," I handed one out to everyone, "And here are some pens." I scattered out about a dozen pens in front of us and we all got to work, ready to get the papers turned in as quickly as possible. Only the first three-hundred bands that turned in their forms could participate. The contest had just been announced yesterday so we probably had at least until tomorrow before all the spaces would be taken.

Half way through the information sheet, there was a question that made me realize something I should've noticed sooner.

"What's our band name?" The others looked up at me with surprise on their faces. Clearly they hadn't thought about it either.

"Uhm what about The Dirty Pistols? Or uh Raptors Revenge or or Cynical Donut Smashers??" Armin quickly suggested with a wild look in his eye. We all gave him odd looks like he'd just snorted cocaine and I shook my head at the strange blonde.

"You're getting too excited. Breathe, Armin, breathe," I chuckled as he huffed like a little kid not getting to have his way.

"What about No Regrets?" Mikasa offered. I bounced the name back and forth in my head, but it just didn't click for me.

"Ehh. Sounds more like a song name than a band name," Armin criticized lightly. Mikasa agreed and as soon as we went back to thinking, Jean threw his hands in the air in exasperation.

"Let's just leave it blank. We can be an anonymous group or something," Jean said rolling his eyes. I slowly turned my gaze to him when an idea hit me.

"That's perfect. But instead of just leaving it blank, let's use No Name," I offered up with a grin. Smiles were all around in the small group, and I could tell this was the band name meant for us.

"I like it," Armin nodded slowly and added in, "We could have some kind of unique style to help us stand out from the rest of the others." We all agreed that would be a good idea to do. Ideas were being thrown and tossed around, but none tickled my, or the others', fancy. Dress up in a cop/paramedic uniform? No, that'd end badly. Wear costumes? Nah, it'd get too hot inside them. Wear nothing but skinny jeans? Straight up fuck no. The scars across my chest and stomach were still visible. . .

I shook my head, refusing to allow any depressing thoughts into my mind. After a good ten minutes of not getting anywhere, we went back to practicing and this time, every time they played they were perfectly synced with each other.

It was time for me to join in.

______

 

Work slowly dragged by that evening with only about a dozen customers coming in to check out the new guitars we'd gotten in that morning. Just about three or four actually bought something.

Since I was working alone that evening, I kept the radio on to keep me entertained. I still had ten minutes left on the clock when a familiar song came on the little radio I had set up behind the counter. There was a short intro before Levi's voice danced around the atmosphere and Lying In Filth's song 'Tonight' played.Two months. Just two months.

The bell on the entrance chimed, signaling a new customer so I set down the guitar I was polishing and greeted the two guys entering the store.

"Hello. Is there anything I can help you find?" They shook their heads muttering 'just looking', and headed straight for the back wall where all the new guitars were. I took my place in the stool behind the counter to get back to polishing the guitar I was working on. All the while, I kept an eye on the two inspecting electric and acoustic guitars. They didn't seem suspicious or anything. It was just a good idea to be cautious.

They both appeared to be around my age, wore rock band T's, black jeans, and converse. One had short blonde hair and the other was really tall with dark brown hair. Nothing too out of the blue. But right as I picked up where I left off with the guitar, I heard a snippet of their conversation.

"...need to get better equipment... only have a three months, dude... buy this one for now then..."

My eyes widened a little at the mention of three months. They must be here to get equipment for the contest. . . It never really registered that we'd be competing against three hundred other bands until then. It was a nerve wracking thought. On the application it'd said we were going to be broadcasted on live TV. There would be so many people watching. . . It was enough to make my stomach churn.

Could we really do this? The auditions were in the next state over. Not to mention our foster parents would destroy us the moment they saw us set foot on a stage or even simply held an instrument. They expected us to be studying law or medical stuff, not lyrics and music.

"Excuse me."

We'd just have to give it a try. The only goal set in my mind from the minute I agreed to do this contest was to win. No one would stand in my way.

" _Excuse me,_ " a hand waved around near my face and I jerked back from the sudden proximity. I'd zoned out again. Whoops.

"Hi, uh, I'm sorry. It's been a long day. Are you ready to check out?" One guy nodded while the other went to stand by the exit.

"You're entering the Rocktagon, right?" he asked while I scanned the price tag. One of my eyebrows raised at his question before realizing he most likely meant the contest.

"If you mean the contest that's coming up in three months, yeah," he gave a conformational nod, "How'd you know I was--"

"We saw you and your band practicing in Armin's garage earlier. I'm Reiner and that's Bert," he jerked a thumb in the direction of his friend, "We're Mikasa's friends. She told us this would be a good place to go for guitars. And it turned out she was right." A chuckle erupted from the man, along with a ghost of a smirk playing across his features. "Apparently it not only has beautiful guitars, but also has a ravishing staff."

I chuckled awkwardly looking anywhere but at the stranger in front of me. I opened and closed my mouth trying to produce something, anything, to say. There was no doubt my face was on fire so there was no point in feeling embarrassment over not being able to respond. Instead, I opted for placing the man's money in the cash register. Reiner laughed and took his guitar wishing me luck.

Soon enough, but not as quickly as I'd hoped, they were heading out the door with a new guitar and I was clocking out, not really ready to go home, but ready to leave the store. I locked up everything and sat on the curb outside the building just to procrastinate a little longer.

It was nice being able to see the stars. It felt like my parents were still here waiting for me to come home. I knew they weren't here anymore. I knew I'd never see them again. But that didn't stop the small flame of hope swell in my chest.

I wasn't able to take much of a step forward today, but I most definitely began to crawl.


	7. Deadlines and Dates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm alive I promise. I'm just super slow. I have imagination constipation. Pain in the ass I swear. But low and behold, here is this. This thing. Whatever you consider it xD

_Eren_

 

 

_There was screaming. I frantically looked around trying to figure out where it came from._

_My lungs ran out of air._

_I was the one screaming._

_"No one will hear," they said."No one will come."_

_I screamed for mom and dad._

_"They're gone."_

_Everything blurred, the only thing visible being a black silhouette against the sun._

_Everything turned into nothing, the only thing tangible were ropes digging into my wrists and ankles._

_Suddenly, every color morphed into different shapes and suddenly I was back home, in my living room._

_"Eren, sweety. Are you alright?" a worry filled voice came from behind me._

_Mom._

_A knee-knocking weight slid off my shoulders. I could breathe. I spun around to face her. Her hands were warm against either side of my tear streaked cheeks and my eyebrows pushed together in confusion. I stared down at my hands as they caught the salty water._

_'Why am I crying? What is there to be sad about?' I didn't remember anything, and I didn't care enough to remember. Whatever the reason, I was happy now._

_"Here, honey. You look a little pale. Sit down," she ushered me along to the couch after pressing he back of her hand against my forehead. So soft. Warm. Alive._

_I obeyed the order and a moment later, was rewarded with a mug of hot chocolate and a blanket. Mom went back to the kitchen where Mikasa was washing dishes and dad sat in the dining room reading the Monday paper. The peace and quiet was almost like a dream._

_Like a dream..._

_"Eren! Eren wake up!" Took a sip of hot chocolate, a yawn following it._

_What did the voice mean? I was awake._

_"Eren, please," the voice begged. I shook my head burying my face in the blanket. What did it want from me?_

_There was a beat of silence._

_The water coming from the faucet froze. The icy glaze began coating everything. Including mom and dad. Those salty droplets cascaded down my cheeks once again._

_No..._

_My eyes widened and I shot an arm out to Mikasa in desperation._

 

_______

 

My eyes snapped open, I gasped for air like a fish, and I was met with nothing but a blurry image. My heart stopped when two hands grabbed my face.

My first thought: _Mom_.

I lunged at the person in front of me, clinging to their small frame like a frightened child.

My second thought: _Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck_...

Armin and Jean had been allowed to stay the night to "have a study group". In reality, we'd stayed up until two in the morning trying to find gigs on craigslist, Facebook, and really just everywhere. I'd been hoping all night the nightmares wouldn't plague my dreams. I'd told Armin they'd stopped long ago so he wouldn't worry. So much for that.

"Eren," Armin whispered into my neck, "Are you alright?" Instead of an audible reply, I nodded my head on the slope of his thin shoulder, pulling him flush against my chest. Afraid to let go. Afraid he'd disappear too.

Instead of crawling back to his makeshift cot, the blonde unwrapped an arm from my waist to pull the covers up as we simultaneously lay down. I didn't loosen my grip in the slightest bit when he turned around so we were spooning.

I couldn't care less if Don found us like this. I needed this.

It felt like I was falling apart.

"Eren," he started warily, "Will... Will you sing to me?" An audible gulp and a shuddering breath echoed off the walls. For a minute, I buried my face deeper in his golden layers of hair. Before I could hesitate any longer, I granted the lyrics from the song Fix You to set sail off my tongue.

_When you try your best but you don't succeed_

_When you get what you want but not what you need_

_When you feel so tired but you can't sleep_

_Stuck in reverse_

Armin relaxed in my arms with a sigh of content. I followed suit as the words kept flowing from my lungs. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I hoped Jean had managed to sleep through the entire scene I'd made.

_Lights will guide you home_

_And ignite your bones_

_I will try to fix you._

 

__________

 

Thankfully when we all woke up, Jean never mentioned being woken up at an ungodly hour. I took that as a sign he was either just being considerate (which was very unlikely) or I'd managed to not disturb Oscar the Grinch. I'd bet my left ballsack on the latter.

Jean and Armin sat at the bar facing the kitchen, watching me cook breakfast. Mikasa had been in the shower for a good ten minutes so she'd be out in about five, just in time for the eggs and bacon to be ready. The pancakes, on the other hand, were just now being drizzled into the pan. While I worked, the three of us chatted about the contest details and deadlines.

"We need to do the video today, don't we? That way if we have second thoughts we can take a quick one tomorrow before sending it in," Jean proposed.

We'd sent in our entries last night and managed to get the 294th place.

If we'd waited till morning, we wouldn't have made it in. Each of us received an email giving instructions on how the next step of the Rocktagon would be executed. Each band/artist would upload a video of them performing to the contest's website, and all that mattered was a thumbs up button. Everyone and anyone was the judge. The top thirty videos with the most thumbs up would continue on.

Shit was going to get intense fast.

I agreed with Jean it'd be best to do the video today as I finished handing out everyone's food.

"Ah, guys?" Mikasa poked her head out from the staircase, a towel wrapped around her dripping hair, and admitted with a frown, "I can't. I go into work in an hour and won't get off until eight."

I dug into the eggs with a shrug of my shoulders, "Then we'll record as soon as you get back."

Armin nodded and offered, "We can practice in and prepare a small set in the garage while you're gone since none of us work today."

Shit. Mikasa looked sharply at me as I sank a little lower in my seat. "You always work on Thursdays."

Damn it, Armin.

"Not today," I retorted nervously. Mikasa could be terrifying sometimes. And the way she narrowed her gaze on my slumped form was just proving my point further.

"Oh?" she mumbled disbelievingly. The towel on her head fell to her shoulders as she stepped further into the room with her arms crossed. "Armin," she snapped her deathly stare on him making him startle, "Did Eren quit his job?"

Straight to the point as always.

"Um, no. . .?" he looked between Mikasa and me with his fork paused at the entrance of his mouth, not sure whether to give in or keep quiet.

Instead, I gave in and huffed out my reasoning. "I took the next few days off," she started to interrupt but I continued, "Before you say anything, so has Armin and Jean. No I'm not making this a habit, I'm not quitting, nor was I fired. Good?" She sighed in defeat but gave a brief nod before climbing back up the stairs to dry her hair. That went better than expected. 

I'd been afraid she'd think I was relapsing back into my depressed self. But that was the part of me I was fighting against. No way I'd give up without a fight.

"I feel left out being the only one having to go to work, though, you brats," she yelled from the top of the stairs. The three of us chuckled while clearing out the dishes.

Lunch passed just as quick as breakfast, if not quicker. Mikasa had scarfed down her breakfast for lunch before heading off to her job. Don was at work until four so we left my house around three to avoid any confrontation with him (of course I made sure all of the chores were done and left a note saying where I would be for the rest of the day).

He'd chop my ass off and have it hung above the fireplace if I left without telling him where I was going. He said he needed to know for safety reasons, but I was ninety percent positive there were unknown hidden intentions. 

There were still four and a half hours until Mikasa could meet us at Armin's garage so we decided to begin practice as soon as we got there. Out of the four of us, only Jean had a car. So today, instead of walking like usual, Armin and I dove in the backseats of the car leaving Jean alone up front. 

He frowned at us in the rear view mirror. "I feel like a chauffer now. Someone sit up front with me," he pouted. Then with a blunt tone added in, "But not Eren. I'm afraid if I'm within touching distance of him I'll lose twenty IQ points." 

I scoffed and shot back, "You can't lose something you never had." Armin bit his lips to keep from laughing while Jean shot us both glares and muttered a 'whatever' before pulling out of the driveway.

Point one for Jaeger.

 

____________

 

"Are you sure you're ready to do this?" Armin questioned me when Jean left the garage to retrieve Armin's drumsticks from his room. I stopped fiddling with the mic stand to stare down at it heavily. 

"No? Yes. I don't know?" I shook my head with a short sigh, not sure at all if I was ready to have millions of people listening to me sing. After a long deep breath I continued, "It's now or never, though."

We'd practiced until six in the evening and had decided we should film some stuff while it's still daylight. Armin nodded at my reply while setting up the camera to fit us all in on the screen. 

The next few minutes were spent in silence until Armin softly spoke, "Okay. Almost got it," he dragged out the last few syllables. 

Jean burst through the door then, yelling, "Guys! You've gotta see this," and frantically waved us to come inside. Armin jumped from surprise and caught the camera with ninja-like reflexes just before it reached the ground. He and I spared a fleeting glance at each other before rushing into the house to see what had Jean's panties in a twist. 

The two toned horse pointed towards the laptop opened, a YouTube video on pause. As soon as we gathered around, he hit play. 

"Jean what--" Armin was cut off by Jean loudly shushing him and turning up the volume. We turned our attention to the video. 

_"Hey, guys. I'm Dot Pixis, the A &R manager for Scout Regiment Records_," a thin bald man swiveling side to side in a leather chair said. His leather vest exposed a couple tattoos on his shoulders and crows feet accompanied the corners of his eyes, making it hard to pinpoint his age. My mind was far from caring about the man's age, however. The was _the_  Pixis. The man who'd signed with LIF. 

I nearly fanboy-ed on the spot. 

For a split second I wondered when I'd become a fan, then my focus snapped back to the man on the screen. " _As you know, only the first three hundred contestants are able to compete. Those contestants have been sent emails regarding details for the first stage in the Rocktagon. Please note there have been a few changes to the deadlines and important dates. The link to the new information will be posted below. We are terribly sorry for any inconvenience. Good luck, everyone._ " The video screen went black but three of us continued to stare in silence when the video continued to produce sound. The man got up from his seat with a grunt and a sigh. " _Man I feel like an old geezer. I'm not even sure I could function daily without my three cups of coffee and my Viagra. Sweet Jesus. Hey, wanna go grab a coffee with_ \--" a pause "--.. _. Is that shit still on?"_ another pause " _Mike, you son of-_ -" 

then the video ended.

Only Jean's snort cut through the thick absence of sound. 

 

\------------- 

 

Armin shook his head in horror at the text in front of him on the computer.

"I-I can't believe this. There's just no way we can..." he trailed off as Jean and I remained hunched over either side of him to read the new deadlines and dates Pixie had posted. Jean finally snapped out of his trance when Mikasa walked through the door.

"Hey, what's... up...?" she spoke, her tone coming off as tired then converting to confusion and worry. Jean and I turned to face her but he answered before I could. 

"We have four hours." 

Mikasa paused mid-step with her draw-string bag over her shoulder, her eyebrows knitted together.  "Four hours for what?"

This time I cut in to explain.  "The video has to be submitted by midnight. Dot Pixis posted a video on YouTube last night saying things have changed. We have less than four hours now to record, edit, and post our video or we're disqualified."

"And also," Armin tacked on, "the final stage date has been changed to six months from now. _And_ there's no longer five stages- there are seven. The next stage is in two weeks from now in Charlotte, North Carolina." 

At this new information, all three of us whirled around to shout "What?" at the blonde still reading the pages. How would we pay for this? How would we get there? Where would we stay the night? How would we hide this from Don? Where-- 

"There's more," Armin waved his hand at us to silence us, "Instead of just performing for the final stage, we'll be touring with Lying In Filth and another band called Stick Up. The top thirty bands at the end of the first stage will be the ones that compete in Charlotte. Ten artists will be knocked out of the competition that night." Armin stopped to look down at his lap and he seemed to zone out for a second before his hands clutched the hem of his shirt. "Can we do this?" he whispered, it sounding more like it was a question meant for himself. 

I couldn't stand the look of defeat smothered across my best friend's face like it was. He needed me in that moment for comfort and reassurance. I battled with myself, afraid to plant false hope in him. There was no guarantee we'd even make it to the second round. However, I wasn't about to sit around and let his doubts crush him.

I rested my hand on the slope of his shoulder. As he looked up to me, I smiled down at him and tugged a layer of his hair playfully.

"We can do this, Ar. We're No Name."

 

\----------

 

Mikasa and I fixed each other's bandages while Jean and Armin fixed theirs. Instead of completely covering our sight, we left an open space across our eyes to see better. 

It took quite a bit of arguing between Jean and I, but we all ended up agreeing on wearing the black bandages similar to the ones I'd worn the first night I'd performed at the café (except we had to improvise this time by spray painting ace bandages) and we all wore wigs found in one of those closets in the house. 

Mikasa's was a long wavy platinum blonde, Armin's a shoulder length dirty blonde with a chunk of hair on either side of his face pulled back to be tied in the back and thin whispy bangs waterfalling over his cheeks, Jean's a short messy mop of dark blonde with highlights, and mine was a short black one with the tips of its bangs sweeping over my eyebrows. 

By the time we finished getting fully costumed, we had an hour and a half left to submit our video. 

"Armin, would you mind explaining why your grandfather has all of these in he first place?" Jean asked hesitantly, pointing to the wig on his head. Mikasa and I were finishing setting up lights and the large white bed sheet we decided to use as a backdrop, but listened in on the conversation, slightly curious. 

Armin ceased his work with the camera to cough and turn his head away as if trying to hide a blush. The bandages already covered his face so only his stuttering gave away his façade.

"U-um, it was for his old job." He shrugged and let out a tiny sigh of relief when no one questioned it further. It just made the three of us more curious. "Okay camera's set up! Everyone dressed and ready?" 

We let the topic of his grandfather drop for now and nodded, falling into place.

We all lined up in from of the camera just as Armin hit record, and he jogged out to join our formation. I cleared my throat softly, assuming they were going to let me do the talking. 

"Hi everyone," I gave a short wave, "We'll be performing a cover of Dear Agony for this video. I hope you like it." Mikasa, Jean, and Armin quickly got situated with their instruments and I took the microphone. "We are No Name."

I took a deep breath as Jean began playing. Then Armin, then Mikasa. They gave me reassuring nods. I let the breath leave me before I took in another quick one and gave myself over to the music. 

_ I have nothing left to give _

_ I have found a perfect end  _

_ You were made to make it hurthurt _

_ Disappear into the dirt _

My grip on the microphone tightened. 

_ Take the time to take my breath _

_ I will end where I began _

_ And I will find the enemy withinwithin _

_ Cause I can feel it crawl beneath my skin. _

_ Dear agony, _

_ Just let go of me.  _

_ Suffer slowly  _

_ Is this the way it's got to be?  _

_ Dear agony.  _

I lost track of time and forgot where I was. I felt lost but safe. The strums of the guitars seemed to clench something inside of me. The slow beat of the drums was nothing compared to my racing heartbeat. It almost felt like I was flying. 

_ Love, pull me down  _

_ Hate, lift me up  _

_ Just turn around.  _

_ There's nothing left.  _

As the song ended, I turned my back towards the camera after slipping the microphone back into its respective holding place. Before the prickling sensation at the back of my eyelids could produce any liquid, I grinned to myself and shook my hands out to rid of the numbness that'd resulted from gripping the microphone too tight for too long. 

The others set down their equipment as I gathered myself and we came to stand together in a circle as soon as we finished.

I smiled brightly as Armin and Jean stood beside me fist pumping the air while Mikasa smacked them gently on the back of their heads and hissed, "We're still on camera, you dorks." 

With that said, I laughed and ran over to stop recording, but first shoved my face into the lens with a wiggle of my eyebrows.

 

\-------------

 

I huffed out a breath of impatience.

"Armin please just post it. We don't have time to edit it." The blonde threw up his hands in defeat and clicked on the submit video button. The rest of us let out a breath of relief. 

There were only ten minutes left to submit videos, and Armin had decided to cut out the awkward ending scene. Due to our pestering, however, he finally gave in and left it, posting the video completely raw.

Now all there was to do was wait for the comments, thumbs, and the final results.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thinking the next chapter will have Levi's POV. Possiblyyyyyy maybeee. And maybe the ratings will go up (; *sniffs* I can smell the smut approaching.


	8. Results and Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit hits the fan, grab your umbrella.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Trigger warning for sexual assault**
> 
> This chapter wrote itself I swear. Gadfock. Sorry in advance for the dark turn at the end lolololol. Thank you guys for commenting. It gives me motivation to keep writing. Seriously this is probably the longest I've gotten into a story before lmao.  
> Any critiquing/ideas for smut kinks/ideas in general are fully welcomed. ^^
> 
> Thanks again~

_Levi_

 

 

A laptop was thrust in my direction, a hand and a muscular arm supporting it. I slapped my pen down on the glass desk in front of me to look up at the intruder. I sighed sitting back in my chair to address my manager.

"What do you want, Erwin? I'm in the middle of writing." The blonde took an unwelcomed seat in front of my desk with a sparkly white smile and lifted the lid of the computer while I took a sip of my coffee.

"Don't you want to see who's winning so far? There's a lot of talent this year," he boasted, clearly impressed with the competition so far. Careful not to spill any of the mug's contents, I sat it down as my thumb and pointer finger met the bridge of my nose to pinch back the headache already forming. "And you might be touring with some of them for a little while," he spilled out in one breath, his smile unrelenting.

Cue the migraines from hell.

"Please inform me, just when the fuck did I decide to go on another tour?" I lowered my hands and narrowed my eyes a fraction of an inch, a muscle twitching in my jaw when Erwin gave me a pointed look.

"When you bet Hanji couldn't down six bottles of wine in three minutes. You said if she could, you'd give her a pack of Oreos and would let her choose your punishment for losing," he cringed at the memory, "We had to buy two bottles of Tum Tums and Peptobismal... And several jugs of bleach for the floors." The blonde grimaced as he sat back in his chair.

I sat unmoving with my typical emotionless expression as I recalled a few memories from that night. There'd been a lot of alcohol, barf chunks, and the putrid smell of regret. Note to self: don't try to show up Hanji with alcohol. I finally shook my head as well, hissing, "That's fucking disgusting," my lips turned downwards, "So this is my 'punishment'?" He shrugged with a nod.

With a final harsh exhale, I placed the laptop on top of the notebook I wrote songs in and started up the piece of technology. I logged in and pulled up Chrome to search for the website. Knowing it'd take a a minute or two to come up, I spun the pen resting beside the laptop around my fingers.

Waiting for the WiFi to load was like waiting for your grandma to finish taking a shit after eating Mexican food.

Erwin popped his lips and stood. "I'll leave you to it, then. If you have any questions, I'll be in the break room fixing lunch," he informed me before slipping out of the room.

When I turned my attention back to the screen, the page had fully loaded. The top thirty bands were listed with links to their videos. I clicked on the first one before realizing the WiFi would be too slow to load the video. I knew what I had to do if I wanted to see just what kind of "talent" might be touring with my band.

I knew and I really didn't want to.

But I was too impatient to wait until I got back on the bus.

So I shut the laptop and whisked it away to find the restroom. If you sat in the corner of the small room, you could bum off McDonald's WiFi next door (or so Mike told me once before a month or so ago). Time to test that theory.

I pushed open the door and after spraying the corner thoroughly with some sanitizer I kept in my pocket and wiping it down, I hopped on to the counter and crossed my legs to set the computer in my lap. Thankfully, Mike hadn't been lying. God forbid I come to sit in a filthy bathroom for nothing.

The signal from here was surprisingly strong and as I went through the videos, none of them lagged.

I watched about twenty of them before I noticed there was one video that stood out from the rest of the shitstain bands. In all of the videos, excluding that one, they all sang fast paced, upbeat songs. Some even had rap parts or screaming. Some had both.

However, this band had submitted a slow song (compared to the other songs posted, it was slow). Also, all of the others started off with everyone already prepared to play and gave no introduction or ending unlike this one.

The singer had an impressive range of vocals- from rough and strong to smooth and feathery. From husky to orotund like. It was an entrancing sound. The instrumentals alone were enough to send a light shiver down my spine. With those two synced together, it was a surprisingly good performance.

To top all that off, their odd but unique appearance with the bandages hiding their identities gave them individuality and an air of mystery. And I'm sure the turquoise eyed boy at the end of the video would have quite a few fans by the end of the day.

After watching their video, I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something tickling my memory.

"Levi?" Erwin's voice ricocheted off the tile walls around me. He spotted me on the counter and eyed the laptop for a moment before speaking up again. "Ah, Pixis said he thought he saw you come in here. Looks like he was right. I made sandwiches and tea for everyone. Come join."

I shut the laptop and scooted off the counter to join the massively tall man. I would search more about that band, No Name, later.

Perhaps it was possible for me to enjoy a tour with other bands. I secretly hoped, but would never admit aloud, that they'd be coming with us.

 

_________

 

_Eren_

 

 

The annoying blare of an alarm destroying my eardrums was the cause of three things that morning. One: Jean fell off the bed with a _thump_ and an _oof._ Two: Armin's alarm clock was a second away from being brutally murdered by the mercy of my own two hands. Three: Jean received a bloody nose for landing on top of Mikasa.

Armin rolled back over to stuff his face into his pillow while Jean ran to the bathroom to let his nose drip. I could hear Mikasa shuffling around beside the bed, most likely snuggling deeper into the mattress and blankets placed on the floor, not the least bit concerned about possibly breaking the horse's nose.

I groaned quietly as I flipped over and grabbed the nearest cellphone. The alarm clock's numbers were fuzzy now from the force of my hand smacking it too hard.

Sorry, Armin.

Squinting an eye open, I read the time on the phone and repeated it in my head a few times trying to process the numbers.

There was the number three. Two dots (a colon probably). Another three. And a zero.

I stared like a zombie at the numbers and choked on air for a second when I fully comprehended the time. "Armin why do you have an alarm set for three o'clock in the morning?" I whined slamming the side of my face into a pillow. Despite half of my face being mushed, I could see his face clearly if I kept my right eye open.

"What the heck are you talking about?" he mumbled half asleep, his eyebrows pressed together. I sighed brining the phone up to rest directly in front of his eyes. One of the light blue orbs cracked open then both popped out wide in horror."It's not morning! It's the middle of the day!" he half-screeched, sitting up with blinding speed.

It was too soon to move that much or that fast, my body was fairly stiff from laying in one spot all night. I arched my back to lean my face away from his sudden outburst, my eyebrows raised, and fully awake now. We'd gone to sleep sometime around when the sun had begun to rise. It wasn't surprising how late we'd slept in.

Armin rolled off the bed and spotted Mikasa in time to land beside her. He snagged a pair of jeans and a shirt off his dresser. Just as he made his way out of the room, Jean came back in with a red nose and a ticked off expression. I covered my grin with the comforter unable to hold back my comment.

"Congrats, man, you've been upgraded from horse to Rudolph." He shot me a venomous glare and sent one in Mikasa's direction when she snorted from inside her cocoon of blankets.

"It's too early to deal with you, Jaeger," he spat then sighed like a defusing bomb. "Armin's grandfather already left for work. He left us all breakfast in the fridge. So if you'll excuse me," he drawled out the last syllable as he backed out of the room.

After a short minute, Mikasa unfurled from her burrito state and smacked the spot next to me. "Come on, time to get up." I buried my head under a pillow with a grunt of distaste at the thought of moving. In return, she snatched my pillow away and swatted me with it.

I held my hands up in surrender yelping, "Okay, I'm up! I'm up!" and scrambling out of the sheets. She walked away laughing when my foot got caught on the sheets proceeding to cause my ass to be severely bruised from the hardwood floor. I shouted a 'fuck you too' before untangling myself from the nest of sheets and joining the other three in the kitchen.

Armin was busying himself with heating up the breakfast while Jean browsed the internet on the laptop and Mikasa plugged in Armin's IPod to the sound system in the living room. The dining room, living room and kitchen weren't separated by a wall so the music echoed around the spacious area. A bar lined the perimeter of the kitchen, much like how our house was set up.

I took a seat on the other side of the bar as she hit play and turned the music down low enough to where we could all talk at a comfortable level without having to repeat ourselves. One of Lying In Filth's songs came on and all of us subconsciously hummed a long with the next four songs that came on.

"A-Armin," Jean choked grasping for the blonde's sleeve as he walked by the bar.

"Hm?" he gave Jean a questioning glance before shuffling over to stand beside the newborn reindeer sitting at the bar, a plastic plate topped with food in hand. He set down the saucer before grabbing a piece of toast and nibbling on it.

Jean numbly pointed at he screen seeming in shock.

Armin leaned over his shoulder with an eyebrow raised. As soon as his eyes landed on the screen, he paused mid bite and his toast fell from his hand. His face went completely blank. I looked warily between the two wondering if Jean had found some kind of free porn site.

Judging by the way Mikasa's face matched theirs when she went to inspect, it wasn't. Unless she secretly liked the boobies and the booties.

I waited on the three to explain what was going on, but after two minutes full of blank stares and gaping mouths, I got up to see for myself what everyone was shitting themselves over. My gaze ran over the page, recognizing it as the Rocktagon's website. Why would they--

"Holy fuck," I heavily breathed out and grabbed a bar stool for support. Mikasa snapped out of her trance to help me to the couch. Then the other two still at the bar came back to reality with the biggest grins spread across their faces. They began jumping around and running around and screaming, "We did it!"

I chuckled at their behavior then that laugh became hysterical. Mikasa giggled in amusement and ruffled my hair.

I was completely blown away. I was in shock, in awe. How had we managed to get third place? And just in fifteen hours. Only 208 people had met the deadline last night. Out of those 208 bands, we had the third most thumbs up. _How_?

"Guys, not to burst your bubble, but there's still eight and a half hours until the voting is over. There's a chance we could get knocked out somehow," Mikasa butted in as Jean was about to pop the lid off a sparkling grape juice bottle in celebration. The two-toned teen and the blonde shot Mikasa a 'fuck you, don't kill my vibe' look and Jean continued to pop the lid off.

"We're up in the top thirty for a reason. Even if a few other bands manage to get more thumbs up than us, we'll still go onto the next stage," Armin retorted grabbing four glasses from the cupboard to pour juice in. Jean and I nodded in agreement and Mikasa shrugged in defeat.

We gathered around in the kitchen, clinking our glasses in cheers once they were filled to the brim. Mine spilt over the side but I licked the drops off in time before they could drip onto the floor.

I noticed a pair of eyes settled on me with interest and I raised an eyebrow at the teen. "Is there something on my face?" I reached up to pat my face down and Jean snorted, tossing back the rest of his drink.

"No. Just thinking you remind me a lot of a dog," he said pouring himself another glass. My eyebrows scrunched together and settled a hand on my hip defensively.

"Oh, really. How so, pony boy?" Instead of giving a proper answer, he waved me off with a lazy hand and exited the room to sit on the couch.

The next couple of hours were spent sipping juice, watching shitty movies on Netflix, playing a couple of songs in the garage for practice, and keeping a close eye on the Rocktagon's website. I was in the middle of stalking a particular band member's twitter (certainly not Levi's pfft...) on my cellphone when the ringtone I had set for Don began playing.

My entire being froze in fear. I'd never told him we were staying the night at Armin's...

_Shit. Shit. Shit._

_Shit. Shit._

_Shit._

And thus, my deathbed awaited me.

"Hello...?" I answered biting my lip hard enough to draw blood. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mikasa staring at me with concern, while Armin's terrified gaze bore into the other side of my face, and Jean shifted his sights around the three of us in confusion. Don's smooth calm voice carried through the speaker.

"Hello, _son,_ " he spat the word out like it was a vile word, "I don't believe you happened to mention you and Mikasa were staying the night. I'm assuming you're still at Armin's?" I choked back my nerves to answer just as bold as his voice had been.

"Yes. We were extremely busy with studying. It took us all night and we didn't finish until midnight. As soon as we were done, I fell asleep. I'm sorry, Don." I knew he was going to force me to correct myself, but it was worth a shot.

"We've gone over this, Eren. Stop being a shitty immature child. You're sorry, what?"

"I am sorry, _father_ ," I gritted out between clenched teeth. He gave a satisfied hum.

"Good. We'll decide on one of the _special_ punishments later for the both of you. See you at dinner," he said offhandedly as if he were commenting on the weather then added in with slightly more edge to his voice, "Don't be late." And with that said, he ended the call.

I stared blankly at my phone in my lap. There was something twisting slowly, unbearably painful, inside my stomach. It squeezed my lungs, making it hard to breathe. It jabbed at my heart, making the blood in my veins race. It wouldn't stop.

"Eren?" Armin whispered softly. Mikasa barely had time to lay a gentle hand on my forearm before I shot out of my seat and smashed the cellular device into the floor.

It wasn't enough.

I picked it up and sprinted to the garage to find the nearest hammer. In the back of my mind, I registered three pairs of footsteps following after me and someone shouting for me to stop, but in the moment, I was too far gone. That thing that'd been creating a massacre inside my body had snapped. It clawed its way up my throat, causing choked sobs to spill from my mouth, and those despicable salty droplets waterfalled down my cheeks.

 _No more_.

I swung a sledge hammer down on the piece of technology.

_No fucking more._

I swung again, a little satisfaction soothing the anger. The pieces scattered across the concrete floor, a couple flew up barely grazing my skin but deep enough to draw blood. I dropped the hammer and fell back to lay on the floor, eyes closed.

A presence crouched down beside me. "Eren, are--" as soon as I heard Mikasa's voice, I cut her off.

"We're leaving."

A pause.

"What?" I rolled my head to the side to look her in the eyes.

"We're going back tonight to get our stuff and we're leaving." She gave me an incredulous look.

"And just where are we going? We have no where to go. If we stay here, he'll come after us."

"If we don't leave, he'll " _punish_ " both of us. He said he'd decide on one of the _special_ ones when we got home. I'm not letting that bastard touch you," I spat furiously.

Mikasa bowed her head and clenched her fists.

Before I could continue planning, Jean piped in. "Will someone tell me what's happening? I knew you had family issues, but what the actual fuck is going on, Jaeger?"

Armin quietly excused himself saying he was going to get the first aid kit for my cuts, Mikasa following along after the blonde, and I snappily explained to Jean the situation.

He paled when I mentioned the things Don had done to me in the past and what he planned to do with Mikasa and I later. He'd never gone after her before since I always offered up myself, sometimes having to reduce to acting like a cock thirsty slut to keep him away from her.

I had a strong feeling it wouldn't work the next time no matter how much I tried to seduce the filthy rich perverted man. I wasn't going to allow there to be a next time.

Jean went silent as I sat up and finished informing him of everything, including the reason why Mikasa and I didn't just move out. I was of legal age, sure, I could get the fuck out. However, Mikasa was still seventeen. She'd be hunted down by our social worker an the police and be brought back. If we left, we couldn't return until she was eighteen. My two-toned friend nodded in understanding.

We both glared at the floor for what seemed like an hour but was probably only a couple of minutes.

"Where will you go?" I looked up from my slouched position with a shake of my head, a humorless laugh.

"No fucking clue. But I'm not putting up with his shit anymore. If he ever lays a finger on her, or even just looks at my sister, I'll stab the shit out of him with the closest sharp object." Jean nodded and cleared his throat.

"Ah, you guys can stay with me. If you want to, y'know. I live by myself in an apartment complex half an hour away from here," he offered rubbing the back of his neck and quickly tacked on, "I-I'm doing this for Mikasa, by the way. I don't want some creep putting his hands on her."

I rolled my eyes at the end of his offer, but sighed in relief, knowing Mikasa would be safe. She'd always kept me safe and took care of me after the whole kidnapping ordeal. It was time I did the same for her.

 

___________

 

"Make sure she doesn't try to follow me. I don't want to her coming anywhere near him. She has to stay at your apartment. I'll grab as much of our stuff as possible. I'll be waiting for you at the school, as we planned. I can't text you to let you know when I get there so just, please, for the love of donuts, be on time. If I'm not there within an hour, leave. And don't go straight home. Get on the interstate and fly down that motherfucker. Watch for anyone who might be following you then get off at he nearest exit and then go home. I don't trust Don in the least bit. I wouldn't put it past him to send someone out as soon as he sees Mikasa's not with me," I ranted as fast as I could to leave to get to the house on time.

Earlier, as Armin was cleaning up the mess of my shattered phone, he'd discovered a tracking device in the back where the battery was. That confirmed my suspicions he'd been keeping track of Mikasa and I. Now we knew that, I spilled my theories about there being cameras being placed everywhere around the house and we agreed that it would be best for Jean to avoid the house at all costs.

I hugged Mikasa and Armin goodbye and headed off, casting a nod to Jean. He returned the gesture as I strolled off in the direction of my deathbed and I tried to ignore the pained expression Mikasa was giving me when I glanced back once more.

The walk from each house felt too short, each minute spent wondering what might happen when Don saw Mikasa wasn't with me. What'd happen when I tried to leave. During the middle of the walk, I took out Mikasa's phone (Armin suggested I dispose of it) and chucked it into a ditch.

Part one, complete.

I took a deep calming breath when I reached the front door.

Time to get this over with. Commence part two.

I swung open the door and was met with an unexpected surprise. Don wasn't waiting for us at the door like normally. I took a slow hesitant step in, softly shutting the door behind me. It was eerily silent like in a horror movie when something was about to pounce on its prey. It was unnerving to say the least.

I ventured further into the household, no Don in sight. The most unsettling thing about the scene was that there wasn't food set out. No dishes had been moved. Nothing was cooking.

Dinner was _always_ finished cooking by seven o'clock sharp. But there was nothing.

Fully aware he could be watching me from somewhere, I casually gathered my school notebooks and a couple sharpened pencils (as makeshift weapons) off the counter and headed upstairs, my heart racing well over its speed limit. I flipped the pencils in my hand to hold them like a shank and quickly ascended the stairs, checking behind me to make sure I wasn't being followed.

My room was the first door on the left, Mikasa's the first on the right, and the door at the end of the hallway led into Don's room. I would say it's Don's and Madlyn's (the 'mom') room, but Madlyn hadn't been back to the house in two weeks. Must've gotten sick of his shit too.

I slipped into Mikasa's room as discreetly as possible, flicked on the light, and got to work throwing her clothes in her backpack for school, grimacing for a fraction of a second when I threw in several pairs of underwear and her bras. I zipped up the bag after stuffing her red scarf inside and flicked the light back off to crack the door open and peep outside at the hallway.

Coast clear. One bag down, one more to go.

I made it inside my room without any complications and switched the light on to pack all the clothes that would fit. In my peripheral vision, I thought I'd seen a shadow pass by the door, but nothing was there when I pivoted my head around to give the space my full attention.

_I'm just so paranoid, my mind is playing tricks on me. That's all. Hurry up._

Releasing a long silent breath, I prepared myself for the trip back downstairs. Part two, seventy percent complete.

With one backpack hanging off my back and the other hanging off my chest, I spared a fleeting glance back at my room then peeked out at the hallway, not spotting anything unusual. I'd had to abandon my notebook and pencils in Mikasa's room to carry our stuff so I was weaponless now.

I took my first step out of the room.

Nothing.

Second step.

Nada.

Third.

Just the drumming of my heartbeat was heard.

I couldn't take the pressure anymore. I took off sailing down the steps, skipping two to three at a time and used the last step to lunge at the front door.

Part two, ninety per--

I twisted the doorknob frantically, trying not to panic. However, I realized with a jolt that it was locked by Don's card and I instantaneously became the definition of panic.

Without warning, my head met the marble counter and my vision wavered. My knees threatened to give out, causing me to lean heavily on the counter. The man behind me, holding my head against the granite, 'tsk'ed at me like he was disappointed.

I gritted my teeth to clear my vision while glowering as threateningly as possible at Don's face.

"And here I thought we could have a little fun in a threesome," he slurred, leaning in close enough for me to get a whiff of the alcohol on his breath and clothes. A wide smirk crept onto the man's face. "You'll be enough to satisfy me though, won't you, my darling?" he purred next to my ear, the prickly hairs of his beard grazing my jaw as his tongue slithered up the shell of my ear.

My body shivered in disgust. With one hand continuing to force my face into the counter, he used the other one to slip off the backpacks from my lifeless limbs- too difficult to move them, I stood helplessly at the mercy of the foul man who'd taken away more than just my freedom.

"How about we start in the living room and make our way to the dining table then your room," he husked, sliding his free hand around my waist to trace the rim of my jeans and caress the patch of skin above the zipper. His grip on my head disappeared and instead, snaked its way up my shirt.

I took advantage of the newfound freedom by using as much energy as I could muster and snapped back into a standing position, succeeding in headbutting the man's chin roughly. It gave me a splitting headache, but I pushed the pain aside when he released his hold on me to rub his jaw. I gathered the two backpacks in my arms and sprinted for the glass doors that led out to the patio.

I made it to two feet before I was football-tackled to the ground, my forehead smacking into the wooden floor. The backpacks fell beside me in a heap and I did all I could to keep myself awake by focusing on them.

_Don't pass out. Don't pass out. Don't you dare. Jean is waiting on you. And so is Mikasa. Move, Jaeger. Get your ass up right now and get away. The doors to your fucking freedom are right in fucking front of you. Fight, damn it._

I squeezed my eyes shut as I felt two large hands skim up my sides, proceeding to push the fabric up to my armpits. My arms shook in protest when I tried to push myself up and I collapsed back to the floor.

Don chuckled in amusement at my weak attempt to resist. He licked a trail up my spine, his waist lowering down on mine. He began to roll his hips against my ass and I felt that familiar beast begin to bend inside my gut.

 _Stop_.

His filthy hands dragged down my pants over the slope of my ass. I clenched my teeth.

_Stop it._

The hands ran up my thighs. The beast didn't clamp my lungs this time. It filled them heavily in an attempt to cool the boiling anger. It was a fail.

 _I said to fucking_ stop.

It snapped and I twisted my head to snarl at the vile animal clawing at my ass like some kind of toy. He laughed hardily at my expression and garbled out, "Oho, feisty tonight, yeah? That's good. Mmn I was hoping for a little challenge." 

Thinking I was going to try to run away, he backed off to let me up. I ordered my murky vision to work as I snatched the chance given to me and swung around to deck the man square in the face. I scanned my surroundings in a flash and snagged the lamp off the coffee table just as he recovered. Without further ado, I smashed the glass into his thick skull. He fell to the floor unconscious and I took that as my cue to exit the scene (of course pulling my pants up and shirt down beforehand).

I stumbled over to the bags and picked them off the ground to start towards the door but paused.

_Fuck. It's still locked by his card._

"Why?" I whined out loud on the verge of frustrated tears and sat down the bags. I was completely done by this point. One hundred percent done.

I limply dragged a chair to the glass doors, inhaled a long breath, and wielded it like a baseball bat to bust the doors. Glass shards flew everywhere and I had half barely cooperating brain to at least cover my eyes and throat.

The alarm system blared angrily and I knew I had a time limit now before the cops showed. Instead of wasting time on inspecting my skin for glass shards or cuts, I forced myself through the door and bolted down the street on numb legs.

It rapidly became harder and harder to remember where I was going. Why I was running. Why I was moving at all. Or was I even moving?

Everything felt heavy.

In the distance I could hear police sirens.

I pushed myself to keep running.

But I just couldn't run anymore.

I caved in to my body's wishes and sat down. I shook my head and looked around my fuzzy surroundings. There was a soccer field maybe? A fence. A giant shadow I presumed was a building. A car with blinding headlights rolled up beside me.

_'There's no way it's Jean. It's been well over an hour. He's probably almost home.'_

I was too exhausted to panic or care anymore. Due to either exhaustion, or a gut feeling assuring me it was safe to rest, I closed my eyes to apologize to my friends for giving up. When a door slammed shut sounding a mile away, however, I pried them open once again to attempt to stay awake. Without warning, a deep unfamiliar voice sounded right beside me, resulting in my body instinctively shrinking away.

"Oh, shit...," a couple of bones softly popped when the man crouched down, "What happened to you?" I gave no response. "Nod if you can hear me."

I shut my eyes and managed a shake of my head despite it feeling like a 100lb bowling ball that could roll away at any given time.

"I'd ask if you're okay, but that answer's pretty obvious," he paused as if in thought before sighing, "I'm supposed to be in a meeting in ten minutes. And I can't just leave you here until an ambulance shows... I guess, for now, I'll take you to a friend of mine who's studying to be a nurse. She'll take care of you, alright?"

As soon as I gave consenting nod, I was lifted up and placed down on a much softer surface in a matter of seconds. I granted myself to relax as the vehicle's engine awoke with a smooth purr. And alas, my conscious was engulfed in darkness.


	9. A New Beginning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This probably the longest chapter I've ever written haha. Its full of happy things so yay for some Eren/Levi interaction~（ ´∀｀）  
> This is entirely unbetad, just a warning.
> 
> Forgot to mention, I tweaked the ending of the last chapter, probably not even a noticeable change. The same things happen, just written differently. And I edited the first chapter a wee bit because it's been eating me alive.
> 
> Time to go smother myself in smut~

_Levi_

 

 

"Ha! Suck it, Farlan! You owe me four doughnuts," Izzy cheered, a smug grin dressing her features. Farlan pouted at the crimson haired girl across from him, tossing his pone onto the table that stretched half way across the room.

"No fair. That game is completely bogus. I was right beside you when we crossed the finish line and that banana should've wiped your ass out!"

She stuck her tongue out at him playfully muttering, "Now, now. Don't be a sore loser," and turned to Petra and Hanji, our assistant manager, with a devilish smile. "Whoever wins gets the package of oreos in the break room." Hanji wheezed in a long noisy breath at the mention of Oreos. She had an unhealthy obsession with them.

The three of them raised their phones closer to their faces for a better view and when the ' _ding_ ' sounded, Izzy and Hanji began cursing relentlessly at their characters to go faster.

I rolled my eyes at the group slumping forwards in my chair. My forehead planted on the glass surface while Farlan exchanged his seat for the one beside me. I cast a halfhearted glare at the man when his knee nudged against mine.

"Ah, come on. I know it's past your beddy bye time, but you could at least try to look alive. Erwin probably just lost track of time gelling his hair back. Captain America has to look his sharpest at all times of the day," he joked. I snorted because of how true it was and briefly turned my attention back to the trio violently playing Mario Kart.

"Awh, come on! Now I'm two laps behind! Fuck you guys. You play dirty," Petra accused of the two.

Izzy smirked down at her phone and chortled, "Sorry not sorry. That's gaming for you."

Hanji manically grinned, "I don't mind getting dirty for a pack of Oreos. I'd kill for those babies."

Petra shrunk away from the brunette woman with uncertainty, yet murmured under her breath, "It's still rude to gang up on another player," and gave up on winning. Neither of the remaining players seemed to hear her, they were too engulfed in their game.

Hanji cursed when her phone chimed from an incoming text, "Shit. Shut up, Erwin. You can wait a damn minute." Everyone in the room paused at the mention of the blonde, even Izzy. Then celebration music rang through the speakers and Hanji bounced in her seat fist pumping the air. "Yes! Those Oreos are _all mine_." Izzy snapped back to attention and huffed at her friend.

Meanwhile, I held myself back from bashing the woman over the head with my chair. If Erwin texted her, it must be important. Perhaps he decided to cancel the meeting. I silently wished that was the case. I was more than ready to get  my ass back on the bus to sleep for once in my life.

I barely got three hours of sleep each night. Coffee and, on desperate occasions, energy drinks were my source of life. Now, I was running low on fuel. And patience.

"Hanji," I started in a deadly calm manner, "Read Erwin's message before your phone finds a home up your ass." She laughed, unaffected by my threat, but complied with my order and opened the message.

Some French vanilla caffeine was desperately needed now. I was considering on just having Hanji relay the message to me once I had some sugar in my system, but she suddenly popped out of her seat with a squeal and beat me to the exit.

"There's an emergency, so I'm outta here! Erwin will be here in a few minutes after he drops off my gift!" she hollered back at the group that was staring where she'd just been.

Gift...?

Well then.

Time for coffee.

 

________

 

No one had questioned Erwin when he finally showed up, we got straight to discussing details on the Rocktagon's rules and setting up the schedules for each stage. In all, it took longer than I'd thought and my insides felt hollow from lack of sleep.

At the end of the meeting, Petra parted ways with us to head for her house and Farlan and Izzy declared they were going to head back to the bus ahead of me. I waited impatiently as Erwin packed in the documents for this stupid contest inside a giant binder. If I began questioning the man's tardiness before everything was packed, he'd end up taking all night to file in all the papers. He was a man all about being prompt. It must have been important.

I savored the last few bitter drops of my third cup of coffee. It was the only thing keeping me from taking a nap on top of the table. That, and Erwin's occasional questions about my opinion the Rocktagon's top thirty.

There was only one hour left until the winners were announced and I was shockingly eager to see if that band No Name would be continuing on to the next stage to go on tour with us.

"Are you waiting for me to finish so you can walk me to my car like a gentleman?" Erwin mused. He received a deadpan look along with my reply.

"No, you're a big boy now. I don't think I need to do that anymore." He stuck his tongue out at me like a giant toddler. I sighed setting down my mug and informed him, "I've been waiting so I could ask you why you were so late to the meeting." Seemingly have forgotten about that, Erwin paused in his movements before cursing and speedily snapping the three rings together and shutting the binder.

"There was a small incident I had to take care of. Hanji's taking care of it now, don't worry," he waved me off, power walking out the door, to the elevator. I kept up easily with his pace despite his long quick strides.

"What 'small incident' could possibly make Mr. Punctual over half an hour late, then make him rush out of work?" I narrowed my sights on the side of his face while he walked swiftly and with purpose. He didn't give me an answer until we came to a halt beside his car.

There was a familiar gleam in his eyes- one of concern and fear. For the many years I'd known this man, that look had only appeared once. It'd shown up when a close friend of his had been brutally beaten by a mugger, to the point of teetering on the edge of life and death.

To see that strong exterior of his cracked again made me even more curious. I waved my hand in front of his face to bring him back to reality and he frowned down at my impatient posture and let out a sigh of defeat.

"On the way to the meeting, I nearly hit someone laying in the road. I figured it was just a drunkard- you know they're everywhere around here- so I got out to help them to a nearby business; that way, they could have a taxi or a friend pick them up. As soon as I got close enough to see the guy's face, though, I saw there were cuts, glass shards sticking out of his skin, and his face was coated with blood."

My eyebrows furrowed as he trailed off, a memory most likely distracting him. He shook his head in wonder and added on slowly, "There was something in his eyes that reminded me of that night I found Oluo... And I'm not sure if it was just a trick of the light or what, but from what I could tell, his eyes were almost a turquoise color. Anyways, I couldn't just leave him there so I took him to Hanji's."

I absentmindedly nodded my head, although I'd stopped listening after he said the guy had turquoise eyes. Turquoise wasn't just a normal eye color. It wasn't impossible for two people to have similar iris colors, but maybe... Maybe it was the singer from No Name.

"Are you going back to check on him?" I inquired the man. I received a conformational nod and made up my mind, making my way to the passenger side of Erwin's Ford Fusion. He lifted a thick eyebrow, but unlocked the vehicle, tossed everything in the backseat, and whipped it out of the parking lot.

I clutched the oh-shit handle on the roof the entire time to prevent from being slung around as Erwin drove like a madman. It was like being on a rollercoaster ride that lasted ten minutes.

Miraculously, I managed to slip into my own little world and began to wonder why I was so curious about this guy. So what if he was the lead singer of No Name? So what if he might not get to compete in the contest?

Oh, well. Sucks to be him.

As much as I tried to convince myself I didn't care, I unfortunately did. That kid had a pretty good voice, and I unadmittingly craved to hear more of it. What would I do once we got there, though? I'd finally find out if it's him or not, but then what? If it was indeed him, then should I tell him good luck, to get better soon? If it wasn't, what would I do? Simply stand there and wait on Erwin to finish checking in on him?

Questions floated restlessly around my head while I kept up the mask of disinterest I so often relied on. I made sure not to let the mask slip off when we reached our destination and climbed the short set of stairs to Hanji's front door. Erwin raised his fist to knock, but the brunette woman flung open the door just as his knuckles grazed the wood. She bounced in her spot, ironically happy with the situation at hand.

"Erwin! Thank you, thank you, thank you. This is just the kind of practice I needed! Hurry up and come in." She beamed at him over her shoulder gratefully as she led us inside her home, informing him, "The kid's all bandaged up and his head injury doesn't look life threatening. There's a nasty bruised gash on the center of his forehead and the right side of his temple, but it'll heal up within a few weeks. He's just gonna have one hell of a headache when he wakes up. And, oh my christ, those pieces of glass were everywhere. It took almost two hours to remove them all."

"Has he woken up at all since he's been with you?" She guided us through the lengthy spacious hallway, all the way to the back of the house, and paused in the doorway.

Everything looked the same as it always did: to the right was unmistakeably the living room- walls were painted duck egg blue, wooden furniture adorned the space, along with a pale brown loveseat (where the kid was laying) and two cobalt recliners against the far wall, sitting adjacent to each other. The pastel blue and white curtains above the seats were drawn shut. Nostalgia nearly consumed me while waiting on the brunette to step into the room.

"He actually woke up once while I was wrapping the bandage around his head. Asked where his jeans were, I think? Something about jeans. He was mumbling so I couldn't really understand, and he fell asleep just as he was about to say something else," she shrugged, pointing to the still figure on the couch wrapped up in a quilt and bandages as she pivoted around to sit in one of the recliners.

Erwin nabbed the second recliner while I stood observing the boy's sleeping form. It took less than a second to confirm this wasn't the person from No Name. This guy had disheveled chestnut brown hair, whereas the singer had raven hair like my own.

I couldn't prevent the sliver of disappointment that sank in my stomach.

"Levi, you can sit. I promise everything is spotless," Hanji lilted, catching my attention with her off-key voice. Holding back a grimace, I looked around and turned back to the lady with a 'are you blind?' stare.

"There's no where to sit. The kid's sprawled out on the couch and you two are already occupying the only other two seats." She gestured towards the loveseat.

"Just sit on the end and put his feet in your lap." I acquired a full blown grimace of disgust from the recommendation.

"No way in hell. That is the most repugnant thing you've ever offered, I swear- and that's saying something considering how much disturbing shit you've suggested for me. Feet are a big fat no. They have thousands to a million germs per square centimeter. I'd sit in Erwin's lap before touch in someone's feet." 

She shrugged and made another proposal, "How about sitting on the other end then? He can just use your leg as a pillow." If the glare she got wasn't enough to make her understand how I felt about that, then she was truly hopeless. 

However, my coffee was beginning to wear off, as was the last of my energy. Judging by the way Erwin was striking up a new conversation with Hanji, we'd be here for a while. I was not about to even consider sitting in the floor. A huff of air left my lungs, my legs carrying me to the couch. I paused at its side in thought.

There was no way I could scoot him over anymore. His legs were already curled up loosely in front of his body. If you ignored the dozens of band aids adorning his tan skin, it was almost a cute picture. 

Begrudgingly, I caved into the fatigue plaguing my body. Not minding the pair any attention as they chatted away, I gently lifted the boy's head, wary of the bandages secured on the side, and slipped into the space, settling his head against my thigh. He didn't stir in the least bit. I checked his chest to look for the slow rise and fall of his breathing and was relieved to see he wasn't just a corpse in my lap. 

Hanji quietly applauded me, evidently amused by my bravery to sit with the kid. She cast Erwin a peculiar brief look, to which he rolled his eyes muttering, "Dear god." His smile contradicted his exasperate tone, however, and she hopped to her feet in a flash. 

"I'm gonna go make us some tea- coffee for you, Erwin, I know. I'll be back." And with that, she disappeared from the room. On her way to the kitchen, she made a pit-stop for a small sphere shaped radio in the hallway, turning the contraption on to a classical music station. I shook my head at her choice of genre, but nevertheless, hummed along to the familiar peaceful tune, subsiding my chin down in the palm of my hand to support my head. 

Orchestra music was, without a doubt, my second favorite genre, rock having it beaten by a fraction of an inch. Erwin's voice finally disrupted the silence that'd begun to lull me into a sleepy daze.

"I'm going to go snatch her laptop to find out who all won. The results are supposed to be posted in just a few minutes." He exited the room and suddenly I was alone with the unconscious young man resting in my lap. A sigh left my lips as I wondered when Erwin and I would be leaving. Maybe I could close my eyes for a couple minutes...

No. No no no.

That would be utterly weird and flat out awkward when he woke up. I smacked a hand to my forehead and grazed my fingers through my hair, scrutinizing his features. His long eyelashes settled against slightly pale cheeks, leading to the soft angle of his nose and the curve of two thin pale pink lips. His bottom lip had suffered from a cut and I brought my hand down from my hair to brush the pad of my thumb along the wound.

I had a vague feeling I'd met this young man before. But I'd met so many people, so many new faces and new names, I had a difficulty remembering people. His eyebrows scrunched up and I abruptly yanked my hand away like I'd been burned. He twisted his head to the side, in my direction, and snuggled his face into my lower abdomen, to which I shrank away from the contact. 

What would he do if he were to wake up at this moment? If moved his head away, there'd be a chance he'd wake up. I ended up thinking better of it and gravitated back into place, the short movement causing the boy to stir again, but this time, his arm swung up to rest above his head over my legs. I shot him an 'are you fucking kidding me?' glare despite him being incapable of seeing it. 

His sleeping face was too adorable to risk waking him up so I refrained from shoving him into the floor. 

Hanji's and Erwin's voices could be clearly heard while the faint clicking of keys accompanied the background noise. It was a battle to keep my eyelids open at this point. Assuming they'd be in there for another couple of minutes, I focused my lazy gaze back on the face pressed into my side.

His features were no longer peaceful. His blank expression replaced by a deep frown, his hands curled up in fists. Without taking full note of what I was doing, my fingers raked gingerly through his ruffled hair again and again. The frown discarded itself and the peaceful expression returned to where it rightfully belonged. I ran my fingers through his hair, nonstop, relishing the feeling of the smooth locks.

The process was soothing enough to pull me into a half-awake state, and just before the back of my head lolled against the couch, I traced the curves, dips, and planes of the boy's face, admiring just how attractive the kid really was. I'd be damned if I didn't get the chance to get to know him.

I left my hand to rest limply against the nape of his neck, and my eyelids fluttered shut, finally caving in to the desire to rest. 

Right as I began to slip into unconsciousness, the pair of voices in the kitchen became louder, closer. I was too exhausted to give a shit. A hiatus of steps were evident when they entered.

Then Hanji murmured a hushed "aww" and with not much difficulty, due to lack of sleep, I held myself back from smashing a perfectly good tea cup into her skull.

Instead of listening to the couple coo and awe over us, I plunged myself into a deep slumber.

 

 

__________

 

 

_Eren_

 

 

I held back a groan as consciousness greeted me with a blinding light that burned the hell out of one of my pupils and a splitting headache that forced my face to scrunch up. It had, no doubt, been sent from Lucifer himself.

Somewhere nearby, a familiar song was playing quietly, echoing throughout the room, enticing me to take another nap. A deep yawn from within my chest encouraged that idea. However, once the bullets of pain bouncing around in my cranium subsided, I took note that the pillow my head was resting on was _moving_.

My eyes flared open to come less than an inch away from a shirt, warmth radiating off of the shirt's owner. Carefully twisting my head up to see who I was sleeping on and where I was, another thing I took note of was the hand cradling my neck. ' _What the fuck?'_

I scrutinized the man above me, only able to see the underside of his jaw due to the way he'd fallen asleep. _How the fuck did I end up-_ -

Last night snapped me back into reality and I froze completely.

No breathing, no noise, no blinking. Nothing.

I did it.

I really did it.

Mikasa and I were out of that hell.

In my moment of pure joy, the man I lay on had woken up. His stormy eyes were half lidded, dripping with sleep. I was unable to hold in a sharp intake of breath when I recognized the man as Levi Ackerman. Of all the people, why him? How did we manage to cross paths again? Not to mention, I probably looked like 100% shit compared to the last time we saw each other when I only looked about 55% shit.

When I realized we were still making eye contact, I shot up from the couch, a furious blush eating away at my neck. My face had been so close... to... I shook my head and gripped the side of the couch as my limbs screamed in protest from the movement. It felt like I'd been thrown into a paper shredder.

"Woah, hey. It's okay. You're okay, kid. Calm down," Levi consoled, his arms shooting out to steady me when I stumbled to the side like Bambi Junior. I flinched away from the hands, afraid they had other purposes than just supporting me.

My legs threatened to give out from under me and I tried to prepare myself for the fall, but the man flung himself off the couch just in time to catch me and set my limp form in his spot. (May I dare say it was pleasantly warm.)

My heartbeat was erratic as I looked around wildly at my environment for an exit just in case. All that was visible was the kitchen and a couple of hallways. It was very open and bright with strands of the sun threading between the curtains above my head and spilling onto the floor in front of my socked feet. Levi stood about a foot away, staring down at me, and I eventually returned his gaze warily.

"Are you alright now?" he asked with an eyebrow raised. After a few deep breaths, I dipped my head in confirmation. "Good. This is--"

"Is this a dream? Am I hallucinating? Oh, shit. I'm dead, aren't I? Dammit dammit dammit. Mikasa's going to kill me. Well, technically she can't, but she's Mikasa she'll find a way to, oh god, I'm so de--"

"Oi, shut the fuck up for one second," he snapped. I shut my trap to listen to the hallucination man talk. He sighed and mumbled something similar to 'liked him better when he was unconscious' then spoke up, "As I was saying. This is--"

"My house!" a new voice chimed in. Levi growled and snatched one of the pillows off the couch to chuck at her. She dodged it by a hair and cackled at his murder attempt. I watched the two silently, easing myself as far back into the depths of the couch as possible.

"Can't I finish one goddamn--"

"Nope."

"....Hanji. You better fucking call the damned carpet cleaner's this instant because your rugs are about to be stained red." My eyes widened at how violent Levi was. He'd seemed so nice when I'd met him on the tour bus.

"Oh now look what you've done. You've scared the poor thing," the brunette scolded, coming over to squat down in front of me. "Don't mind him. He's always grumpy before he's had his morning coffee," she assured me with a wink, "Do you want any? Or some tea perhaps?"

I declined her offer and instead asked to borrow a phone. She tossed her cell phone to me after unlocking it and headed towards the kitchen to brew their caffeinated drinks. I needed to call Mikasa, Jean, or Armin to make sure Mikasa was alright. They probably thought the worst when I didn't show up back at Jean's apartment in his car. I hated making people worry about me.

As soon as the dial pad popped up, I punched in the area code and paused. I didn't know Jean's number. I didn't know where Jean lived. It would be risky to text Armin since there was no telling whether or not Don had his phone bugged. I especially couldn't show up there. Armin would be the first one Don would go to for a mini interrogation.

Wait, since when did I start thinking things out beforehand? I ran my fingers through my hair roughly and sighed, not sure what to do.

"Need a phone book?" Levi offered. He was now reclining comfortably in the seat beside the sofa. His arms flexed in the position they were in, raised over his head, arms crossed. It was a nice sight.

One of his eyebrows lifted and I shook my head at the offer and at myself for staring.

"Don't you have someone you can call in case of an emergency? Mom? Dad? Some sort of guardian? A friend?" I lowered my gaze to my toes with a shake of my head and a quiet 'no'. I really had no one.

A beat of silence passed. The man's eyebrows slowly furrowed.

"Hold on. Haven't I met you before?" My jaw nearly dropped. He didn't remember me? I guess it was understanding considering how many new people he met nearly every day. I nodded and started to explain our grocery shopping day, but stopped myself as soon as I opened my mouth.

If he was to remember my name, would he remember my voice when I'd sang for him in his room? Would he connect the dots and realize I'm in the band No Name? Did he even watch those videos? A sudden thought smacked me in the face so hard, I whipped my head around to face Levi.

"Does Hanji have a laptop I can use?" I demanded with urgency. He cocked an eyebrow but disappeared from the room for a moment and came back with a silver laptop covered in random stickers and buttons. Instead of questioning the woman's design, like I so badly wanted to, I started up the computer and impatiently waited for the desktop to load.

Levi curiously leaned over my shoulder, over the arm rest of the couch, and watched while I typed in the website's URL. The site's page looked completely different, other than the logo smack dab in the middle of the main menu.

I nervously clicked on 'The Top 30 Winners' tab and gripped the side of the laptop so hard I feared for its life. The page loaded agonizingly slow, and just as the page was nearly fully loaded, the screen went gray and a little dinosaur popped up saying 'You Are Offline'. My face turned to one of absolute horror, like I'd just seen my dog gotten shot. Levi snickered beside me and didn't bother to cover it up when I turned to frown at him.

"Oh don't look at me like I just took a shit in your Lucky Charms. Jeez, kid. It'll come back on in a second," he mused then added on raising his voice, "Her WiFi is just complete shit." Hanji's head slowly peeked out from around the corner of the hallway.

"Do not offend my WiFi! Blame Erwin! He's watching his filthy German dungeon porn again." Levi and I swiveled our heads around for me to give her a horrified expression, while Levi merely twisted up his face in disgust.

"I don't even want to know how you know what he's been watching," Levi murmured. Meanwhile, I pulled my legs up closer to my body, nervously glancing around.

"I-I'm German... ," I whispered to nobody in particular, eyes wide with terror. Levi snorted softly and Hanji shuffled away, bent over from laughing so hard.

"He's not into younger guys, you're safe," Levi grinned bumping his elbow against my shoulder and adding in, "Or guys at all, for that matter. He's as straight as a ruler." He was fully perched on the arm rest of the couch now, because, for whatever reason, he preferred the end of the sofa rather than the middle.

I shook my head, ignoring the comment, and refreshed the page when the WiFi came back on with five bars instead of one. My nerves were already sky high again. One by one, the videos loaded from last place to first place.

When the first ten went by, I became doubtful. What if we didn't make it?

Another ten went by.

Who am I kidding? There's no way we could have made it. There were so many more bands better than us. Five more went by.

Not the fifth.

My stomach dropped.

Not the fourth.

We'd tried so hard.

Or the third.

Was our only chance ruined?

Or the second.

Why does life hate---

I became paralyzed when my eyes landed on the last video. Only one word could process through my head: what?

My jaw hung loosely like it'd been broken. If I wasn't afraid of the fly that was buzzing around deciding to lay its eggs on my teeth, my jaw would probably still be lying on the floor. Tears pricked at he back of my eyelids when I began reading all of the supportive, positive comments that were dropped in the feedback section. There were, of course, the typical ass holes who'd written some ignorant and insensitive shit, but the others who called themselves our "fans" defended us.

We had fans. People who liked our sound. Actual _fans_... I let out just a short giggle. That humorless laugh quickly transformed into uncontrollable gaffawing, nearly as bad as Hanji's laughs. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Levi staring at me like I'd just gotten doped up on every drug under the sun that just made me laugh harder.

By the time I'd managed to calm down, my face was coated with tears and Levi looked like he was struggling on trying to decide how to comfort me or if I even needed to be comforted. In the end, he patted my head uncertainly and asked a question I wasn't sure how to answer.

"Did you enter the contest or something?" I blankly stared at the screen in front of me, thinking.

We needed to be careful. If any of our names/identities were exposed, it'd be glaringly obvious who the other three were. Then Mikasa and I could be in danger of being dragged back to that damned house or she'd get sent away to another adoptive family. I'd kill before I let someone take her away from me. She was the only family I had left.

"Heck no. I'm just, uh, a huge fan of these guys. We're really good friends," I lied as smoothly as I was capable of and pretended to stretch my arms over my head to hide the red tint covering my ears. The man raised his eyebrows disbelievingly.

"Oh, really? What are their names?"

"I can't give away their identities. I promised I wouldn't tell anyone." Levi slowly nodded, still unconvinced, and was most likely about to carry on with the questions, but at that moment, Hanji bounced back into the room with three mugs and breakfast plates in hand.

"I fixed your eggs how you normally like them, and I already dropped some butter on your waffles," she handed Levi his plate and turned to me, "I wasn't sure how you like your eggs so I just scrambled them and threw in some cheese on top. Is that okay?" Now that I'd calmed down, my stomach grumbled loudly, angry at me for not noticing the hunger sooner. That annoying warmth slithered up my neck to my cheeks and I nodded in response. She amusedly laughed as she set the plate down in my lap and placed the mugs on the coffee table before retiring to the recliner to the right of me.

Off to the side, I noticed a piece of sausage on the side and tentatively offered it to Levi. He cast me a questioning once-over before accepting the gift. During our breakfast feast, Hanji asked small questions like, "How are you feeling?", "Do you need a couple pain relievers?", "Did you sleep well?", "How're the eggs?", "Do you live around here?"

The last one nearly caused me to choke on a piece of my waffle. I didn't live anywhere. Was I considered homeless now? Not sure how to answer, I fidgeted with the fork, unable to look either of them in the eye, and murmured, "Not really, I guess."

"You guess?" Levi piped in, confusedly. Instead of giving a response, I hunched over the plate a little more and set down the eating utensil.

"I don't think he wants to talk about it. Sorry, uh, wait- what's your name?" I chewed on my lower lip, trying to decide if it was okay to give away my name or not. So long as they didn't know I was the vocalist of No Name, I declared it safe to leak out a first name.

"Oh, right. Ah, I'm Eren."

A spark crossed through Levi's eyes that might've been recognition and I sent up a silent prayer to whatever higher power watched over me that he wouldn't remember me singing for him. I didn't mind if he remembered everything else. We stared each other down until Hanji greeted me properly and I dipped my head as a hello. My focus bounced back to Levi one last time before landing, and staying, on Hanji.

"If you need a place to go, you're welcome to stay here for a while. We'll be here for two more weeks before we head out on another tour," she insisted. I let out a long breath, not really comfortable with the idea of staying in some stranger's home, but not sure where else to go.

After a long moment of hesitation, Levi pitched in, "Or you could stay on the bus with me if you're afraid to stay here. I wouldn't blame you." He shot Hanji a short wary look which she returned with a childish grin, including sticking her tongue out. I set my forehead down in the palm of my hand as the brunette gathered the dishes and took them to the sink.

Staying the week with Levi on an empty tour bus didn't sound so bad. Then again, it was a really really bad idea. Self control was a foreign thing to me. Would I be able to keep myself in check? With what little faith I had in myself, I relayed my final decision.

"I guess I could stay with one of you guys. I really don't want to intrude, though; I just need to find my friend and I'll be gone," I promised, lifting my head to look them in the eyes. The brunette nodded with a smile while Levi narrowed his piercing eyes on me and tipped his head in agreement.

"That's okay, dear! Take as long as you need," she said sweetly then tacked on in a whisper, "I think our little Levi here would miss you if you left too soon." The short man nabbed the pillow between us and hurled it at her head.

She didn't have time to duck this time around. She simply cackled like a crazed hyena from the blow and winked at me, egging him on further. He ended up flinging all of the pillows at her, and when he ran out of ammunition, he went for the sofa cushions.

I joined in with Hanji on the laughing festival and the man beside me paused to shoot me a half-hearted glare. I pretended not to notice the pink tinge in his cheeks.

"What's so funny, eh?" he inquired, picking up a pillow from the pile around Hanji's feet. My lips pressed together in a firm line and raised my shoulders, trying to look innocent."I think you do know." He smacked my knee with the sack of cotton and behind him, Hanji snorted.

"So you'll beat the shit out of me with my own pillows, but with him, you just tap his leg with it? That's unfair!"

"He's injured, you're not," he shot back simply. The woman crossed her arms over her chest muttering "fine" then made her way over to us.

"I have to go to the office with Erwin for a while. We're setting up the arrangements for airline tickets and writing out the confirmation email for the band members and artists." I quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Confirmation email?"

She nodded, "Yep. We don't want to buy an airline ticket for them if they aren't gonna be able make it to the stage." I hummed understandingly, mimicking her head motion. Note to self: check email soon.

"Are you ready to go, Hanji?" A new voice called from behind a wall. A devilish grin grew on the woman's features, accompanied by a as she looked between Levi and myself. I could honestly say that look unsettled me.

"Yeah! Don't you wanna say hi to Eren?"

"The kid's awake and you didn't even tell me?" The voice became clearer as the person neared the room. Hanji coughed into the bend of her elbow and bumped her hip into Levi. Before he could balance himself, she patted him firmly on the back, tipping him forwards in my direction.

I clenched my eyes shut, readying myself for the pain when he would land on the small wounds scattered around my body. The only thing that I felt were his legs landing on either side of my own and the part of the sofa beside my shoulders sinking in to support his small form. Hesitantly, I lifted my eyelids to meet Levi's smoldering gaze.

A part of me worshipped Hanji for putting us in this position while another part of me wanted to continue Levi's murder spree with the pillows.

"Oh, I see," the owner of the voice spoke up from beside us with an amused expression. He was the definition of a model. Tall, built, handsome, and, no doubt, a charmer. His blonde hair was parted on the side, a couple strands dangling loose over his mesmerizing blue eyes and a couple of thick eyebrows. Only when the man continued talking did I realize I was openly staring. "Well, hello Eren. I'm Erwin. And I see Levi has already made himself an acquaintance."

Levi shoved himself away from the couch as Erwin teasingly laughed at the shorter man's furious glare. Wait, hold up, was this the one who watched German dungeon porn? I cringed desperately wishing I hadn't remembered that. I waved at the taller man in greeting and held back a laugh as Levi proceeded to rush the pair out of the house.

Once they were gone, he found his way back to the living room and ran a boney hand through his dark locks. I tried my hardest not to think about the fact that Levi fucking Ackerman and I were now alone in the same house. He stood there a moment, staring over at the window before locking his focus on me.

"They seem nice," I mused. He grunted in response then went to rifle through a small stack of remotes resting on a shelf below the TV. A small one was used to turn on the sound system, another turned the TV on, and another controller was for a Wii. Finally, he used the game controller to open up Netflix and swung his head around in my direction.

"With all those cuts and your head injury, I suggest a large dose of Netflix and snacks for the entire day," he dictated and tossed the controller to me. "Pick something while I grab some rations. No meats, right?"

My hand faltered as I typed out a movie title and my body froze in shock. He gathered that I was a vegetarian just by one meal? I dragged myself out of my stupor with a nod. After he disappeared to the other side of the house, I scrolled through the movie genres until I found the one labeled 'Family' and clicked on _The Penguins of Madagascar._

When Levi returned, a bag of Doritos and a box of cookies in hand, he stopped in his tracks to shake his head at my film choice, yet the corners of his lips tilted upwards. (Could you consider that a smile?) The Doritos were tossed in my direction along with a bottle of Gatorade.

My eyebrows raised at his eagerness to rip into the cookie package. I couldn't contain the smile that stretched across my face even though I attempted to hide it with the Dorito bag. The sight before me was too adorable. He must've felt my gaze raking over him because he flipped me the bird and clutched the package closer to his chest protectively. Unable to smother my grin, I outright laughed as he shoved a cookie in his mouth and glared at me from the corner of his eye.

For the rest of the movie we played eye-tag, ate more snack foods, and once had a pillow fight over whether Skipper or Rico would win in a fight. It's needless to mention Levi won.

And for the rest of the day, that's all we did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I meant to post this link likeeeeeee 2 chapters ago? But anyways, here's how I think Eren's voice would sort of sound.
> 
> https://youtu.be/Vi_uw-QY7_o
> 
> Yes, I really did choose a song from Frozen XD


	10. Reunited And It Feels So Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eren departs from the Hanji household.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd say sorry for this being soo so so so so late, but I feel like nearly every author does that so you guys know the drill haha. College stuff, depression, new story ideas, all that fun stuff going on and yeah. Okay, I'm gonna say sorry anyways. Gomen, my lovely readers. I hope you guys enjoy, because next chapter is when shit gets rolling.

_Eren_

**  
  
**

Two long ~~amazing~~ weeks dragged by being filled with movies, lessons on cleaning (courtesy of Levi),  dinner "dates" with Hanji and Levi, and Facebook searching. And during those nights, Levi and I would set up the pull-out bed in the couch and share the space. Hanji had squealed the first night she caught us sleeping under the same blanket. For us, we were just two guys sharing a comfortable spot for sleeping. Nothing more to it. Although, I couldn't help but wish there _was_ more to it. I mean, come on, the guy looked like a deity.

Much to Hanji's amusement, Levi and I continued to nag over each other's favorite characters in movies, most of them being Disney films with the occasional DC or Marvel movie. I also discovered that Levi was surprisingly okay with my obsessive love of Disney movies, so long as they weren't any of the newer shitty ones. If I ever picked something he didn't like, he'd either threaten to not share his cookies and popcorn or would violently chuck pillows at me. Or turn off the TV. Rude as fuck.

I made a side note to buy cookies and pillows for Levi's birthday.

Something odd I'd noticed over the course of the week was the daily cleaning routine Levi kept up. Dust twice a day, sweep and mop once a day, clean the dishes as soon as they were finished being used,  tidy the living room, dining room, and kitchen, and laundry. Of course, I had to ask why he cleaned so much. That only resulted in his cleaning routine becoming mine as well with him throwing in tips and comments on my work.

It made me briefly wonder if he had some sort of cleaning fetish. That brought warmth to my cheeks and I mentally slammed a brick into my face for even going there.

Sometime in the midst of all the cleaning and movies, Hanji would arrive home from work whining desperately for food. We often went to a fast food restaurant for lunch and some place exceptionally nice for dinner. I'd vehemently refused to dine out the first time, but my refusal was met with Levi's glare and Hanji's own stubbornness. She'd assured me repeatedly that she had more than enough money to take us all three out to eat.

Despite her insistence, I still ended up being hauled unwillingly out to the car, bridal style, by Levi. Hanji whistled suggestively from the driver's seat causing a blush to claim my cheeks and Levi's middle finger rose in front of her face after tossing me in the back seat.

That was the first of our many dinners together.

That day was also the first time I devised a plan to get in contact with Jean. I'd initially thought it'd be easier to find Jean's Facebook, if he even had one, and send him a message. However, it proved to be more challenging than expected.

Because for whatever reason, the guy had four fucking accounts.

I'd sent messages to all four, silently praying he'd reply to one of them later that day or the next. Four more days had passed, and there was nothing awaiting in the inbox.

Now I was getting worried. Just for extra measure, I checked my messages one last time before letting out a long breath full of impatience and a wedge of concern. Surely Jean had to be active on one of the accounts, right? He was the socializing bunny, for fuck sake.

 _What if he and Mikasa had been taken away? Surely Don wouldn't do something as rash as kidnapping, right?_   I blinked a few times and discontinued those thoughts before they could venture further into the dark side and ruin the good mood I was currently in.

I wasn't even aware of the presence behind me, as I'd been so caught up in memory lane, until the person cleared their throat right beside my ear. My body jolted in my seat at the dining table, my head swiveling head around to identify the newcomer. However, I nearly tipped over in my seat when my nose brushed against Levi's, and a startled squeak emanated from my throat.

The man snorted, one corner of his lips lifting into a smirk at my expression while a short finger prodded my cheek in amusement. He turned away to occupy the seat across from my own chair and rested his forearms on the surface of the dining table, hands clasped together loosely in front of him.

"What're you up to?" he asked curiously, nodding to the laptop. A frustrated huff and the slam of the lid closing on the computer expressed my current feelings.

"Still trying to get in contact with my friends. I'm worried about them," I told him honestly as I crossed my arms on the table and buried my face in them. In all honesty, I was expecting him to give some sort of short phrase similar to 'I see' or 'Oh, okay' or 'Damn, that must suck.'

The past week, and even during those two brief meetings all those months ago, he'd proven himself to be a rather. . .  _entertaining_  person to hang around. He was unique in his own odd ways. Stood out from other people. I thought the man was on an entirely different level than I, with the way we always kept each other at an arm's length. However, I never would've guessed he had any interest or concern in my well-being, or life in general, for that matter.

So it was a bit surprising when Levi cleared his throat, pressed a comforting leg against mine (which really just made my heart palpate even harder in my chest), and spoke reassuringly, "I'm sure they'll respond soon. Don't worry over it so much, okay? It'll be fine."

"But there's someone," I paused, staring blankly at the table between us, not sure how much I should say. I couldn't keep my worries bottled up forever. I already knew how that would turn out. In a hospital, connected to an IV for a week, more therapists. Fuck no. "There's someone who might be after them. I'm afraid they're hurt. Or worse." There. It was out.

Levi's eyebrows knitted together with confusion, his lips pulling into a frown. "Why is someone threatening your friends?"

"Long story short he's um," I paused once more when all the memories of the times I was thrown to the ground, punched, kicked, groped, and raped by that one man came to mind... I shivered unwillingly, unable to look anywhere but at my balled up fists on my lap. "He's a shitty excuse for a human being and probably psychotic. My friends haven't done anything wrong to deserve it" I muttered bitterly.

  Levi's features softened a bit.

"I'm sure they're fine. They're probably wondering where you are right now." I tugged my gaze up to Levi's and gave an affirmative hum.

_If you only knew. They're probably panicking over not having their vocalist. One of their best friends. Would they still continue on to the next stage for the Rocktagon? Maybe. . . If I could hook up Hanji's printer, I could print my plane ticket and meet up with them at the airport._

As I relaxed, a hint of a smile was applied to the man's lips.

I realized, then, as I was soaking in the beautiful sight of his smile, that not everyone got to see all of these sides of the famous Levi Ackerman. The fans only saw what he allowed them to see- a smirk, a frown, no expression at all. His friends were allowed more access to those sides, but his emotions and feelings seemed off-limits.

Like he didn't trust easily.

That realization led to a painful clench in my heart and thoughts swarmed inside my head like angry bats in a cave.

_I shouldn't hide who I really am from him. But what if he told someone? Not on purpose but simply by accident? My band's identities would be exposed, Don would find us, we'd be fucked. But if I betray Levi's trust, would he forgive me? Would he never want to speak to me again? Never want to see me again? We hardly know each other, but honestly, I'd miss him too much. But that'd be selfish to lie so we can stay together. Then again, what choice do I really have?_

Levi had slipped into my life once, twice, and now this. And without even realizing it, he'd become someone I considered a friend.

  Friendship requires trust, though. And what did I have to offer? A bullshit secret because of my bullshit life.

_I shouldn't have started No Name. This is my punishment for thinking I could be someone I'm not._

"Eren," the man consuming my thoughts called out to me. I focused my attention back on Levi, then noticed the finger he pressed to the space between my eyebrows. "Don't hurt yourself thinking so hard. The situation is out of your control right now, so there's no need to stress over it, brat. Got it?"

I nodded with a sigh and buried my face in my arms.

_But it is in my control..._

* * *

 

"Hey, wanna come with me to get tea? Looks like you could use some time out of the house," Levi observed when he saw me curled up on the couch, watching episode after episode of Spongebob. From the tone of his voice, I had no other option.

I reluctantly flung off the blanket that I'd been wrapped in and slipped on my shoes as the man made his way to the front door. It appeared he wasn't going to wait on me to catch up so I ended up sprinting after him, making sure to lock the door on my way out.

We walked side by side, down the cracked pavement, in the direction of the downtown area. At first, I couldn't think of any shops that sold tea besides the grocery store, which we'd already passed by a little over five minutes ago. But I suddenly got the suspicion I knew where he was heading.

"We're heading to that cafe, aren't we?" I stated in the form of a question. Levi glimpsed over at me in surprise.

"You've been there?"

"Once or twice...," I turned my head away to cover the red tint adorning my ears. In my defense, I hadn't been in there more than a handful of times. That wasn't really important, though.

In my peripheral, I watched as Levi slowly nodded his head and inspected me a little too closely for my liking. Thankfully he didn't say anything else until we got to the counter to order. He ordered me a latte and an early grey tea for himself while I snatched a booth in the corner, by the window.

I couldn't keep my eyes from consistently wandering around the room, couldn't keep my leg from bouncing. Levi noticed but didn't bring it up. It was nerve wracking to venture in this area now that Don was like an angry wasp and still possibly in the area. I wondered what excuse he'd given the cops when they'd shown up.

Levi snapped his fingers between my eyes, efficiently bringing me back down to earth.

"Oi. I asked you a question," he exasperated with a shake of his head. I quickly apologized and asked the man to repeat the question. He took his sweet time to sip on more of his tea before repeating himself. Unfortunately, just as I'd taken a swig of my coffee, he said, "Do you want come on tour with us to Charlotte?" and needless to say, my coffee went down the wrong tunnel.

I hacked into the crook of my arm and nearly started laughing at Levi's disgusted expression. This man was going to be the death of me.

Pushing my choking accident aside, I stared into my coffee like it held the answer to his question. Would it be a good idea to go? I'd already taken up so much of their time. How were they not sick of being around me? If I were to say yes, there was the possibility I could still perform. I just needed my--

"Eren?" a voice called out from across the room where the entrance was. My heart floundered inside my chest like a fish until I realized it wasn't my step father. It was Armin.

I shot out of my seat with wide eyes and tackled the blonde in a bone crushing hug. He stumbled under my weight but managed to stay standing and hugged me back just as hard.

"Holy shit, Eren," Armin whispered without regarding his language then pulled away for a moment to search my eyes and face. "Are you okay? What happened? Are you ever going to stop disappearing on us, you freaking idiot?" Tears welled up in his eyes so I tugged the blonde back to my chest, rubbing his back, and guided him back to the booth where Levi was sitting, watching our exchange. The man didn't need to ask questions, he remembered the kid.

"Armin," I spoke softly when his tears had subsided. His face was still pressed against my chest but his breathing had leveled out. He glimpsed up through blonde eyelashes to meet my eyes. "How is everyone?" The blonde perked up in his seat and whipped out his phone.

"Mikasa's okay. She was really torn up when Jean came home alone. And I think he's been feeling guilty over it, but he's not injured or anything."

"And how've you been?"

Armin shot me a flat look then gently bumped his elbow against mine. "I think you saw the answer to that a few minutes ago. The real question is how've _you_ been?"

I pulled my lower lip between my teeth and glanced over at Levi who was on his phone, presumably texting. As if he knew my eyes were on him, his eyes lifted to encounter my own gaze. For a fraction of a second, his line of sight flickered to my lips but quickly returned to his phone.

"I've been good," I told Armin as the corners of my lips escalated. A smirk spread across Levi's expression as Armin finally registered the other man's presence. The blonde began frantically pointing at the man while his jaw flapped open and shut. "Levi and Hanji helped me out."

"Helped you out? More like babysat," Levi snorted and turned to Armin as I was about to cut him off, "Your friend has an unhealthy addiction to Disney movies and eats like a starved five year old."

Armin let out a mirthful laugh and nodded his head in agreement. Meanwhile, I had my arms crossed over my chest with my lip jutting out in a pout, mumbling under my breath.

"Yeah, he's always been that way, unfortunately. There's no hope," the blonde grinned over at me. Traitor. "So are we still going to the Ro--" He yelped as my foot slammed down onto his before he could finish his sentence. He was about to ask another question but saw the shake of my head and zipped his mouth.

"Oh, that new Rod Reiss movie? Yeah, duh," I chuckled nervously. With any luck, Levi hadn't caught onto what he was really about to say.

"Oh good. I didn't want to end up going alone," Armin played along smoothly.  ****

I was grateful it’d been Armin I’d ran into rather than Jean or Mikasa. Jean would’ve blown my cover right off, while Mikasa would’ve dragged me back to Jean’s house by the ear without any questions asked. Which would, of course, also blow my cover. So either way I would’ve been fucked.

“Eren, I need to ask you something,” he glanced over at Levi, “In private. Excuse us.” Once Levi waved us off, the blonde proceeded to tug me away by the wrist and I nearly fell out of the booth in the process.

I allowed myself to be pulled into the men’s bathroom before prying Armin’s hand off my wrist. He ducked his head down to check under the stall doors to make sure it was cleared out.

“Okay. You’ve got a lot of explaining to do. But first off, what happened that night? That gash looks awful, Eren,” Armin said in a hushed tone. I subcosciously brought my fingers up to the scabbed gash and sighed as I closed my eyes.

“We should save that for another time. This isn’t the best place to talk about it…”

“Right, sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, Ar. It’s okay. When we meet up again, I’ll tell you everything.”

“When we meet up?” he cocked his head at me, “You’re leaving again?”

“I don’t know. Levi offered to take me with him to the Rocktagon, but you came in right as I was about to give him an answer,” the blonde opened his mouth to speak again but I interrupted, “Listen, Levi doesn’t know I’m the lead singer of No Name. And he doesn’t know you guys are in the band too. It has to stay that way. If he found out, there’d be a good chance more people would find out, and once our names are posted everywhere, Don will be able to track us down.”

I took a deep breath after my rant while Armin observed me with a thoughtful look.

“I see. Well, then it’d be safer to come back with me-- shh,” he shushed me as I started to object, “--It’ll be fine. I’ve moved all of my stuff and the band equipment from my house over to Jean’s apartment. We’re all using his place as a safe house for now."

I was taken aback at the mention of him moving into Jean's apartment. For a moment, I was silent. It wasn't that I didn't want to go back with him and be with my friends again... I just didn't want to leave Levi's side.

There was no doubt he'd be at the Rocktagon, but we wouldn't be able to communicate. I couldn't be seen or else.

"Okay," I exhaled heavily, "I have to get my bags from Hanji's then we'll go. Did you walk?" The blonde nodded in response as weexited the restroom. "Greaaaaat. There's  so much shit I have to..." my voice trailed off when I caught sight of a living nightmare. My stepfather sat at Levi's table, talking quite animatedly, might I add. While my brain was a goner, Armin's still seemed to be processing as he yanked me back behind the corner of the short hallway.

"They know each other?" Armin asked no one in particular. I briefly shrugged and shushed the blonde so I could try to listen to what they were saying. It was no use,  though. They were just out of hearing range.

My head was peeked around the corner, eyes locked on Levi, hoping to snab his attention. And it looked like whatever higher power decided to answer my prayer when the raven's grey orbs caught mine. One of his eyebrows rose when I jerked my pointer finger at the exit desperately. Thankfully, Armin and I ducked back behind the wall just as Don began to follow Levi's line of sight.

We didn't move again until Levi came strolling around the corner, arms crossed over his chest.

"He's gone. Why were you and your friend hiding?" he demanded, a scowl stretched over his features. Thank the heavens for the blonde angel that answered for me.

"He's a piece of shit." 

My eyebrows rose at Armin's vocabulary. I must've been rubbing off on the blonde. Whoops.

"And how is he--"

"Can we just go? Please? I'm going back with Armin so I need to get my things," I said shortly. The wall Levi had let down around me was immediately built back up as his face returned to one of nonchalance.

Well, that hurt. Why was everything so painful all of a sudden?

The man strolled to the exit, assuming we were following, and our trio walked in silence the entire way to Hanji's. Armin's hand was fisted in the back of my shirt like he was afraid I was going to disappear again and only let go when we were inside the house. 

"Wow this is a nice place," Armin commented.

Levi brought my bags out to us and said nothing. He simply stood there by the front door, staring blankly at the floor.

"Ah, I'll give you two a moment alone," the blonde chortled and slipped outside.

My chest squeezed as I realized just how far Levi had allowed me into his walls. I chewed on my lip in consideration before deciding why the fuck not.

Snatching a pen from the little table beside the exit, I grasped the man's arm and asked Armin for his cell phone before shutting the front door again. Without even looking up at the man, I could tell by the fiery feeling on my face that he was watching me with his smoldering steely eyes. His arm fell limply back to his side when I finished writing.

"Anytime you wanna talk, I'm a phone call away," I assured the man with a soft smile. He tipped his head, his features noticeably more relaxed than before. "Tell Hanjij I said thank you for everything. And thank you, Levi, for keeping me sane." I grinned, longing to just touch him. His arm, his face, his neck, just anywhere so I could feel his warmth before I had to go.

We'd be seeing each other tomorrow or the day after, but it wouldn't be the same. Quite possibly nothing would be the same after this.

"Pfft. Like I'd answer your shitty calls," he spouted off with no real veno. They were more playful than anything. The he added in a softer tone, "Have a good life, kid." 

I couldn't stop myself now.

I threw my arms around his neck roughly to pull him as close to me as possible. That warmth- Levi's warmth- was so familiar to me now, I didn't want to let go. Levi returned the hug after a second then, just as quickly, started to scramble out of my hold.

"Okay, okay, that's enough hugging for now. You're going to wrinkle my shirt," he said as I finally broke myself away from him. Despite his words, his lips were gently curved at the corners. Not in a full smile but close enough to be one for him. He reached up to ruffle my already mussed hair and told me to get going.

And so I did. 

I stepped out onto the porch with one last glimpse behind me.

And as the raven closed the door, I could've sworn I'd heard him whisper, "I'll miss you, kid," under the noise of the whizzing wind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try to update this weekly, but we'll see. I'm working on another fanfic about gaming and my love for these two AU's are battling each other aha. Lemme know what you think in the comments ^^


	11. Hotel California

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been trying forever to write fics. I managed to get this shit out FINALLY so yay. Forgive me it isn't very long. Hopefully next chapter will be worth it (;

“Eren.” A beat of silence passed. “Yo. Earth to Jäger. Wake the fuck up,” the voice reiterated loudly directly in my ear. I jolted awake, swinging a fist at the persistent bastard. Jean narrowly dodged my fist and shook his head, arms crossed with impatience. He received a hello from my middle finger in return. “Saw that one coming a mile away. Come on, we’re boarding the plane.”

Off to my left, Mikasa and Armin were checking their tickets and mini travel bags while Jean remained by my side, snacking on a breakfast burrito. I scrunched my nose up at the smell. It was way too early to be eating. Especially when your breakfast’s about to experience its first takeoff with you. 

A heavy sigh emitted from my throat before I spoke, “Armin, what time are we checking into the hotel?” The blonde’s head snapped up to give me his attention. 

“We’ll be landing at about four. So we can check in whenever.”

“Excellent. More nap time,” I grinned, pushing myself up from the chair. Mikasa looked like she wanted to argue for a moment, but must have thought better of it and began the short walk towards the terminal instead. 

We were spread out across the plane with Mikasa and Armin being near the front while Jean and I were placed near the back. For nearly ten minutes, I sulked over having to sit beside Seabiscuit until I spotted that familiar undercut in the corner of my eye and a chilling rush sparked through my veins. Shit. 

“Jean,” I hissed, ducking my head behind the seat in front of me. Jean looked up from his phone to crook his head in my direction.

“What are you do-- Hey!” Jean’s eyes flew open as I jerked him down behind the seat with me. “The fuck was that for?” I pressed a finger to my lips to shush him and jerked a thumb in the direction of the band.

“Levi’s on board. If he’s on here, then the others are probably too,” I fretted, glancing around to try and spot them. Jean peeked over the seat, his eyes narrowing in on the man up front, then slid to over to scan the gates.

“Shit. Is that them?” 

I followed his gaze and immediately recognized the bright red pigtails and the bouncing brunette ponytail rushing past them to the front. They settled quickly, and from what it looked like, recieved a short reprimanding from Levi. Jean and I sat back in our seats with a relieved sigh. We were safe for now. There was still a chance, however, one of them would need to use the bathroom during the flight. In that case, they’d have to walk right past us… All we could do was keep our fingers crossed.

Jean nudged me after the flight attendants finished their safety routine and the plane began to crawl at an agonizingly slow pace. 

“Hey, uh, have you ever been on a plane before?” he mumbled. I noticed his grip tightening on the arm rests. 

“Nope. Never. All I know is when the plane goes up, it’s going to feel like you’re free falling. I’ve watched enough television to know some things,” I shrugged. Was the temptation to be a douche bag and not warn him of turbulence possibly happening very strong? Yes, indeed, it was. But I spared the horse from being spooked anymore and went ahead and told him all that I knew.

Throughout the entire flight, I kept a sharp eye on Izzy and Hanji since they seemed to be the most observant and hyper of the bunch. For the most part, though, they were focused on what was happening in front of them or going on outside in the sky. 

Meanwhile, Jean had managed to fall asleep, Armin had taken some medicine to knock himself out, and from the looks of it, Mikasa was keeping an eye on the band up front as well as I. Needless to say, the flight was overall boring and we were on edge the entire time. Thankfully, in the end, nothing happened. We booked it off the plane once we were allowed to exit, checking back every few seconds to make sure the band hadn’t spotted us. The last time I caught sight of them, Levi was frowning down at his phone while Hanji and Izzy peered over either side of his shoulders, their expressions mimicking the raven’s.

Then they were gone.

And I had to remind myself that this was for the best.   
  


 

* * *

 

 

“216… 217… 218… Hell yeah, guys, we got the room on the end! It has a balcony!” Jean sped ahead of us to unlock the door. 

“Finally. It only took a decade to find the room,” Armin huffed. To be fair, the rooms were pretty complex to find. It was like running through a maze. The bottom floor was 100’s, second floor 500’s, third floor 200’s, fourth floor was 400’s. That wasn’t even the challenging part. The challenging part was figuring out which hall to take since there were no signs. It was practically like getting lost in Wonderland.

On the upside, however, the drive here had been peaceful and relatively silent besides our driver asking questions here and there about the contest. Mainly Armin and Mikasa had answered all of the questions. I hadn’t felt up to talking to anyone, and Jean, as usual, was in his own little world, soaking in the city. Apparently he had a weakness for road trips and travel. 

Just didn’t seem to be a fan of planes in the end, though. 

Our group filed into the room, breathing in the smell of fresh linen and the chilled air, seeping from the vent. The room was brown and tan themed with golden pieces scattered around the room. Mikasa and I parked our suitcases on either side of the bed that was furthest from the door while Jean and Armin took the other that was beside the bathroom. Once things were settled down and our instruments were tucked away in the closet, I turned on the television for background noise and grabbed the schedule booklet from Jean. It appeared our practice times and locations were listed on the last page of the packet.

“What time do we have to be up tomorrow?” Armin yawned, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. He plopped down onto the bed face first and buried his head underneath one of the pillows. Meanwhile, Jean and Mikasa looked to me for the answer.

“Uhh… it says there’s an opening ceremony at noon, followed by a picnic provided for all of the contestants. As for practice,” I paused for a moment to skim down the page, “All of the bands have been categorized... We’re in group D, so… practice for group D is at four in the afternoon. Looks like we get to sleep i---” A sudden loud snore interrupted me mid-sentence. Jean snorted with a roll of his eyes. 

“Good going, you’ve put the brains of the band to sleep,” he scoffed, picking up the pillow on the blond’s head, and smacking him with it. I shot him a flat look and a middle finger in return.

“Yeahmm I’m up, I’m up,” he garbled out and pulled himself the rest of the way onto the bed like a monkey. I cocked an eyebrow at him as he criss crossed his legs just to pull the pillow to his chest to use for support. “Sorry, Eren. I caught most of what you said. Sounds like we have a few hours of free time after lunch. What are you guys thinking? Explore or practice before practice?” The three of us shrugged to one another. 

“We could use that time to pick out what song we want to perform,” Jean suggested. A light gasp came from my lips. 

“What’s this? Jean’s being useful? Is the world ending? Where’s the apocalypse?” 

Jean mirrored my face from earlier and even included the middle finger. 

“Fuck off, Jaeger.”

I mocked his one finger salute and turned to Armin.

“It’ll only take maybe half an hour or so to pick out a song. Did you happen look up any places we could explore while we’re here?” I asked, sitting down beside Mikasa on the bed. 

Armin shook his head and shrugged, “I hadn’t even thought about it.”

“We’ll just walk around tomorrow and see what’s here,” Mikasa suggested and then stood up, “I’m gonna go order pizza. After we eat, we better go to sleep. Tomorrow’s gonna be a long day.” With that said, she left the room and the rest of us shared a look. 

Jean was the first one to say something.

“She knows she can order over the phone in here, right?” Armin and I shrugged in unison, not even about to question it. She’d figure it out eventually. “Maybe I should go get…” Jean’s sentence fizzled into silence as his eyes made contact with the television. I followed his line of vision to see my own face, as well as Mikasa’s, on the screen. 

The news. We were on the news, listed as ‘missing’… and ‘possibly kidnapped.’ Armin and I shared a glance at each other, both of us wondering what Don was up to. He knew we ran away. The ‘missing’ label would be understandable if he was trying to hunt us down. The ‘possibly kidnapped’ title, on the other hand, was just odd. 

I could see the wheels cranking in the blond’s head as well, as he had dropped his gaze to the floor and his fingers were lightly tapping the pillow. Jean was shaking his head slowly, still immersed in the news channel.

Then it came back to me- Mikasa was in the hotel somewhere, face exposed. If someone caught her, we’d all be totally fucked. I cursed loudly, jumping up from the bed and practically flying to the door. 

“Wait! Eren!” Armin called out and scrambled to catch my wrist, “You can’t go out there, someone might recognize you. We’ll go get Mikasa, alright?” 

“No, I’m not staying in here. Someone could have taken her into custody!” 

“Look, Jaeger, we’re more than capable of getting her back if someone has--” I cut Jean off with a death glare.

“I’m not staying in here,” I declared, emphasizing each word slowly. Armin’s eyes lit up in a flash and in the next second, he was digging into my suitcase.

“Okay, but wear this instead then,” he ordered, tossing my wig and wrap to me. I groaned but obeyed the commanding officer. As I wrapped the strip around my face, Armin adjusted the wig onto my head properly, and I caught Jean putting on his own out of the corner of my eye.

“Are we all dressing up?” I questioned them, finishing up the wrap. Armin gave an affirmative noise while he struggled into his own wig and bandages. In under five minutes, we managed to fix our faces and get out of the apartment. The three of us received a few  _ looks _ from other guests who were staying here- most of them were just other band members in The Rocktagon- but our focus was mainly on getting to Mikasa before someone else did.

The first place we checked was the lobby. No luck there. Then we headed to the dining hall. No Mikasa was found. Then out of pure intuition, we checked the pool. Also nada. The longer we had to look, the more anxiety gnawed its way through my gut.

“Okay we’re going to have to split up,” Armin panted, holding onto my arm for support, “Jean, stay down here and keep checking the lobby, dining hall, and the pool. I’ll go back to the apartment to see if she’s back there. Eren, go to the upper floors in case she managed to get herself lost.” I gave him an ‘are you serious?’ look but didn’t bother to argue. “Yeah, yeah, I know she’s not stupid. But these floors are confusing. Even I’m having trouble figuring out where everything is. Our meet up spot will be the lobby. Meet back there in thirty minutes.”

Each of us nodded then split off in different directions. I headed straight for the elevator and barely managed to slip through the doors as they were closing. Without bothering to look, I mashed the button at the top of the row and bent over to catch my breath. The elevator needed to hurry up.

“Well hi there.”

My body froze in an instant, my eyes blown wide. 

_ Shit. _


End file.
